Things Clarkson has taught you (that probably aren't true)

If you ever find yourself being targeted by a helicopter gunship, hop in a Lotus :)
 
The best ways to end a Cool Wall argument...

1) Get right in the other person's face and say "Thaaat's theeee/annnn ennnnnddd!"

2) Rip off their microphone.

3) Should a cherry picker come into play, turn it off and leave the other person up high whilst placing their favourite supercar and old promo pictures of them in the Seriously Uncool section.

The worst thing to do? Tackle them when they run off with a picture of one of the cars, because they'll just eat it.
 
You don't need a crash helmet to drive an Ariel Atom.

Also:

A Viper can write its own name. *hides*
 
Street Spirit said:
You don't need a crash helmet to drive an Ariel Atom.
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Yes you can choose not too, but it'd help if you did.

That was last month:

Just over a week ago French actor Jocelyn Quivrin was killed in a road accident as he apparently lost control of his car at the entrance to a tunnel on a motorway in a western suburb of Paris.

Quivrin, who most recently appeared in the French film LOL (Laughing out loud) alongside Sophie Marceau, was just 30 years old.

Initial media reports suggested that he had been driving his Ariel Atom, a high performance sports car, well in excess of the speed limit especially as the vehicle?s speedometer had been blocked on impact at 230 kilometres per hour (143 mph).

Police however were more circumspect and their caution seemed to be warranted according to a report in the daily newspaper Le Parisien, which said that experts? analysis indicated that he had been travelling at 97 kilometres an hour before the accident happened.

But the exact circumstances around Quivrin?s death remain unclear even though police have called for eye witnesses, and this is perhaps where the tale takes a more than slightly macabre turn with the presence of a mobile ?phone.
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^Thank you for proving my point. On a related note (not trying to be insensitive here), how can he talk on a mobile phone while driving an Atom... at THAT speed? :hmm:
 
Street Spirit said:
^Thank you for proving my point. On a related note (not trying to be insensitive here), how can he talk on a mobile phone while driving an Atom... at THAT speed? :hmm:
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Maybe he was using the camera on the phone to take a video of his speed-distorted face to post on www.levoustube.fr, in which case he is a strong candidate pour un Darwin.

Qu'est-ce que c'est le Francais pour "That's not gone well."?
 
10. A $1000 US Chevrolet Camaro is more attractive than a Toyota Hi-Lux equipped to go to the North Pole

9. Chelsea boots tend to be favoured by Volvo owners

8. The ability to ride a Shetland Pony should qualify you to ride a stallion

7. A motorcycle under 250cc can be ridden by anyone in Vietnam

6. Miniature crabs are good to eat in Japan

5. A Volvo station wagon can't handle wet grass on a hill

4. Morris Marinas are attractive targets for high-altitude pianos

3. Teenage girls are actually attracted to middle-aged men trying to pull driving stunts (or is that too creepy?)

2. Kate Silverton is more fun in a car than Fiona Bruce

1. All tame racing drivers are related as cousins
 
^ Nah, that'd be under "Things Hammond Has Taught You" or even a generic "Things Top Gear Has Taught You". :)

Anyhoo...

If you live in Greenwich, and you work near Buckingham Palace, and you don't want to drive, just run!

If you want a Cadillac, buy a Vauxhall.
 
CrazyRussian540 said:
I'm sure it is.

As he said, "Its not what you drive. Its how you drive it."
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Thats true, but I can't see anyone buying a M3 to drive it like a Prius :p

I've learned from Jezza that Hamster had his teeth whitened.
 
that, no matter the outcome or what the rules stated, you can win every contest/race if you word the results better than the other 2 in your favor.

that you can end every conversation/meeting/family gathering with the phrase "and on that bombshell..." (actually works)

that writing things like "NASCAR is rubbish" and "manlove is great" and driving through a small town in alabama will be perfectly safe.
 
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