If you could survive a plane crash with a TG presenter - which one?

Goose+

Goose+

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I've had some spare time recently and kept wondering about LOST and that movie where Tom Hanks is trapped on an island with a football :|

I was wondering if you had a plane crash and you ended up alone on a small remote tropical island, which top gear presenter would be the most useful for your survival?

The island would look something like this;
Lost-Island-Screensaver_1.png


I think Jeremy would be the most useful, for me anyway.

1) Jeremy is quite a funny guy so I guess that would make the first 2-3 weeks on arrival on the island slightly more positive and cheerful. And in that movie when Tom Hanks is stranded he considers killing himself - so a cheerful person with you might stop you doing that.
2) I also figure that because Clarkson has spent so much time in Barbados and other Tropical places on holiday that he would be the best suited to the climate, where as May and Richard haven't.
3) Jeremy is a hands-on guy and would help me build a raft or smoke fire ! This might help us get off the island.
4) If the raft building exercise went wrong, Clarkson is the fattest of the three presenters so I could resort to cannabalism and eat him (worst case scenario).


Who would you pick out of the 3 then? :|
 
Clearly James May. The hamster would just panic, and Jeremy would build stupid things that crash and go up in flames for no apparent reason.

James would be the one who could actually help you survive.

... on a sidenote, I can't help the feeling you're producing threads because you're bored.
 
Could we choose from one of the international versions? Because I would pick Steve Pizzati - he studied science and engineering so he'd probably be ok at knocking up a shelter, and he's an outdoorsy type of guy so he wouldn't be completely useless in the wild as I suspect the TG UK hosts would be. Otherwise James May, because he's the most interesting so at least I wouldn't get bored while we starved to death.
 
Obviously I would choose James... do we even need a thread to figure this out?

Jeremy and Richard are fun on the show, but they are not people I would want to spend a lot of time with... Jeremy would be too annoying and in your face, and Richard would probably want to talk about fashion, hair products and cuddly dogs.

James on the other hand seems like just another bloke you chill with, but one that could hold an interesting conversation with you on many topics... most blokes just seem to run around in circles discussing sports, 'chicks', flashy cars and other things that assert their manliness to each other.

In a practical manner James is a good choice too... Jeremy probably tastes of cigarettes and being old, and Richard is small so he wouldn't provide sustenance for as long.
 
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Goose+ said:
3) Jeremy is a hands-on guy and would help me build a raft or smoke fire ! This might help us get off the island.
Click to expand...

:lmao::roflmao::rofl:

That's just funny....Jezza is probably the most useless one in the bunch, the man is afraid of spanners, screwdrivers and powertools !! James is the only one who actually knows something about science, engineering and tools. Not a whole lot, but vastly more than Hammond or Jezza.

Jeremy is a hands on guy.....:rofl:

Shawn said:
Obviously I would choose James... do we even need a thread to figure this out?

Jeremy and Richard are fun on the show, but they are not people I would want to spend a lot of time with... Jeremy would be too annoying and in your face, and Richard would probably want to talk about fashion, hair products and cuddly dogs.

James on the other hand seems like just another bloke you chill with, but one that could hold an interesting conversation with you on many topics... most blokes just seem to run around in circles discussing sports, 'chicks', flashy cars and other things that assert their manliness to each other.

In a practical manner James is a good choice too... Jeremy probably tastes of cigarettes and being old, and Richard is small so he wouldn't provide sustenance for as long.
Click to expand...

What he said.
 
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Yeah, easily James since he is the most practical, the best company as well as knowledgeable about most science stuff.

Richard would be OK, so long as he did what he was told and didn?t start with the ?short, angry, brummie guy? routine.

Jezza would be worse than useless.:lol:

(*Thinks* Jodie Kidd would be preferable to all the above.)
 
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Easily Mr May. Knows a lot of stuff, and I'd have some really cool discussions with him after smoking some palm tree leaves.



Goose+ said:
3) Jeremy is a hands-on guy and would help me build a raft or smoke fire ! This might help us get off the island.
Click to expand...

Jeremy Clarkson said:
I don't like manual labour.
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;)



Shawn said:
most blokes just seem to run around in circles discussing sports, 'chicks', flashy cars and other things that assert their manliness to each other.
Click to expand...
Generalize much?:blink:
 
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^ That's what the majority of guys my age over here talk about most often... it's always refreshing to meet someone who dares to deviate from the norm.

I don't know, I just don't see the point is socializing with social sheep. I like unique personalities and people - James seems like the most unique of the TG trio to me.
 
melbournian said:
Could we choose from one of the international versions? Because I would pick Steve Pizzati
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On this basis, I'd choose Warren Brown. He's ex-Army, so he'd know a thing or two about survival. He's also managed to get from Beijing to Paris in a 100 year old car relatively unscathed, so he's got experience in surviving some extreme conditions. His ukelele and ability to draw funny pictures in the sand would also help keep morale up if it started to waver.

That said, if restricted to the TG UK 3, I'd have to go with Hamster. Given that he came from the most humble background of the TG UK 3, I reckon he'd also be the most resourceful ... even if it's not all that obvious. May would be a very close second, but given that May already has the majority of the vote, I'll pick Hamster.
 
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Goose+ said:
1) Jeremy is quite a funny guy so I guess that would make the first 2-3 weeks on arrival on the island slightly more positive and cheerful. And in that movie when Tom Hanks is stranded he considers killing himself - so a cheerful person with you might stop you doing that.
Click to expand...

Sorry, are you talking about Jezza? Cheerful? I think he'd actually complain about every tiny thing, then burn your shelter for entertainment. After 3 days you'd be forced to push him off a cliff just to find some peace and quiet.

Hammond strikes me as not very bright but highly energetic. Thus, while you were asleep, he'd build a boat to get you off the island, but he'd do such a bad job that it would sink before you'd even got it launched. And he'd probably use every tree on the island making it, so you had no way to build another one.

James, on the other hand, seems quite intelligent and level-headed. Of course, he has absolutely no sense of direction, so after you finally got your raft built, he'd sail you in circles until you both died of dehydration. Your only hope for survival is to ferment some coconut milk and get him so drunk he passes out and can't take the rudder from you.
 
Hmmmm, after giving this more thought than any sane person would, here are my results:

Jeremy
Pros-
He is big
He would eat anything
Would probably be very good at ordering me around and a few of his ideas may even be good

Cons-
Arms like pipe cleaners
Hates manual labor
Has a bad back

Richard
Pros-
likeable guy
Would probably be willing to pitch in and do his share
He is very fit

Cons-
He is small
Does not like fish
likes to jump into things without thinking

James
Pros-
Not bossy
Works well with others
Thinks things thru before jumping on them
Doesn't believe in half assing anything
Has good ideas
He can cook
Interested in alternative ways of doing things

Cons-
Can be slow doing some things
No sense of direction

So while they all have plusses and minusses, Thinking of who would give me the best chance of surviving/getting off the island, I would have to pick James.
 
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spicysaurus said:
Sorry, are you talking about Jezza? Cheerful? I think he'd actually complain about every tiny thing, then burn your shelter for entertainment. After 3 days you'd be forced to push him off a cliff just to find some peace and quiet.
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Thanks for the chuckle. The thought of having to push Jeremy off a cliff to get some peace will be making me smile for the next week at least because it is so true.:lol:
 
Hate sticking with the pack, but James is my pick. It's all been said, but what the hell:

Jeremy would have a few good ideas and would work on them consistently whether he liked it or not if he felt it necessary, but he would be obnoxious and might blow up the island for fun.

Richard would be willing to help and would be good company, but wouldn't be able to eat (no fish?)

James wouldn't panic, would be able to feel out the situation, create something to get us off the damn island and probably would be personable and interesting to talk to while waiting on the island/boat.
 
I'd pick Jeremy, cause I'd argue with him 24/7 about random things.

At least I wouldn't be bored, which is gonna be the biggest problem on an island.
 
James, for all the reasons stated above, plus, well, you know.... as a not-a-dude stuck with a dude on an island for what is likely to be a long time. :whistle:
 
Clarkson and Hammond are equally useless, so it would be Captain slow.

May > Clarkson > TopGear Dog > Hammond.
 
James. I think hes actually the most proper man out of the three. Probably knows how to survive. Jeremy would have just plenty of useless ideas, and Richard would be hopeless.
 
Well they're all hopeless on their own and even more hopeless with the three of them, I would just not have the plane crash in the first place.


But if I had to have a plane crash, Richard is my first pick, because I can't stand people who get lost (James) and people that are hopeless at building things (jeremy).
 
Jeremy? Nope. Considering his love of camping (or lack thereof), and his penchant for taking shortcuts when building stuff (and usually screwing that up too), he would be my last choice...unless there's a Toyota Hilux with an outboard motor attached to it on the island.

Richard? Nope. Although he is from the country, he is fairly useless. Even though he's enthusiastic, his projects usually end up being ambitious but rubbish.

James? Nope again. Although he seems to be the most intelligent of the three, it would take forever to get anything done and even if we managed to build a boat, he'd probably get us lost on a different and worse island.

Top Gear Dog? Hell yea. Would keep you warm at night, never talks back, wouldnt go through nicotine withdrawls, and probably tastier than the other three.
 
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