I for one am speechless. :?Twilight has reached whole new levels of fucked-up:
It is my sworn duty in life to kill that man and steal Taylor Swift for myself.Spoiler Text: (Click here to toggle display)
Robert Rodriguez needs to film this. Right. Fucking. Now.Sweet Christ-kabob you need to read this.
A C-section by chewing through the mother with your teeth? A super-baby kicking through mom's spine and ribs, crippling her? An adult werewolf that is sexually attracted to an infant vampire? Twilight has reached whole new levels of fucked-up:
Yo Blaro, i'm real happy for you and i'mma let you finish, but Beyonce is the best woman to love of all time, OF ALL TIME!!It is my sworn duty in life to kill that man and steal Taylor Swift for myself.
I mean, uh, that IS the guy that she's dating or whatever, right? I dont' keep up on this tabloid crap at all. I just love Taylor Swift.
Edward answered in a lifeless voice. "He thinks you're pregnant."
The words sent a warm shiver down my spine. The little nudger fluttered inside
I stared out the window for a moment, but the nudger didn't respond.
Edward had just called my little nudger a thing. He said Carlisle would get it out.
I knew there was nothing left inside me, and I faintly remembered the bloody
removal scene, but the physical proof was still hard to process. All I knew was
loving my little nudger inside of me.
She was the same one I'd fought for from the beginning. My little nudger, the one who
loved me from the inside, too. Half Edward, perfect and lovely. And half me ?
which, surprisingly, made her better rather than detracting.
My baby. My little nudger.
Dear God, I can't do this anymore. Mother of God, please save me from this wretched prose. This is what girls are getting moist all over? I fear for the future of our species.
If someone knows what they're doing, writing in first person can allow the author can do interesting things with an unreliable narrator, or even just use the perspective in compelling ways.Who the hell writes in the first person? The author clearly needs psychiatric services and immediate medication.
Plenty of great authors wrote in first-person view: they just don't suck at it like Meyer does. They manage to use its specific characteristics to their advantage, either through a folksy, working class or child's viewpoint, or through an unreliable narrator that adds another layer of deliberately ambiguous meaning to the text.Who the hell writes in the first person? The author clearly needs psychiatric services and immediate medication.