My Top Gear fantasy is taking over my life

[scowy]

For all of you poor souls with James May fantasies, it appears you are not alone.

From a letter sent to the Daily Mail on the 29th August 2008 concerning a womans obsession with James May:


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...-mistress.html (about halfway down the page)

My Top Gear fantasy is taking over my life

Dear Bel

I am a 40-year-old, professional, intelligent, attractive and, up to this point, emotionally stable Christian woman who has developed a 'crush' for the first time.

I have fallen completely in love with the TV presenter James May, who is totally unobtainable - and I have no idea how to deal with this, or how to stop my unconscious feelings.

I cannot wait to fall asleep at night because then my fantasies become real, and I watch every episode and re-run of Top Gear to see him.

I should be going out on dates - but men are never as witty or intelligent as him.

What on earth makes a woman my age irrationally fall for a person on TV? Don't tell me I'm lonely and in need of a social life, because that's not true.

There was a woman who became obsessed with David Walliams to the extent that she had an injunction taken out against her.

Am I so different - though I have not tried to contact James, nor gone through his rubbish bins?

I never felt this way about my ex-husband, and since I am a Christian I wonder if a higher power is trying to tell me something.

What if he is the only man I will feel this way about? I am desperate, pathetic and frightened of my feelings.

Kay

Well, I've always been a Richard Hammond woman myself, especially after I saw him astride a motorbike.

Seriously, though, when I first read your letter I thought it a spoof (although I don't think I've ever had one) but on reflection I think you're real and so is your 'crush' - if an unattainable fantasy can be anything to do with reality.

I've had other letters from women similarly afflicted.

Last September, a girl told me of her passion for a young actor and reading my reply (sensible stuff about not watching his DVDs and imagining him with the nastiest traits) one or two ladies wrote saying it's not that easy to kick the crush habit.

If this wasn't making you so unhappy I'd tell you to enjoy the dreams and hope you run into a man with similar driving skills.

But I wouldn't want to be responsible for your crush developing into something illegal; the David Walliams story wasn't funny.

You don't want this obsession to ruin your life - and it's starting to do so.

You haven't told me when it all began, so you should go back mentally to analyse what was happening at that time. Was there a trigger? Are you worried about getting older?

If you are serious about wanting to find out what's going on, perhaps you should consider that you have a form of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (which is far more than compulsively washing hands) and seek help.

Visit www.mind.org.uk to find out more about OCD and start by finding a therapist. No one will think you silly.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can be useful, so I think you should forget all that 'higher power' stuff, turn off the TV and do some research.

PS: Oh, and if the letter was a spoof, thanks for prompting my pleasant fantasy of riding pillion with the Hamster.

[emil_t]

sad thing she said: "I cannot wait to fall asleep at night because then my fantasies become real" there are people in the world that live in their own world, they're called something

i understand that she likes him he's a superstar, but not in a way to change your life

[efoolution]

A new one for 1001 Uses for a James May, crazy-womans obsession ...

[Mineworksfine]

You have to have a certain sympathy for the poor lady. Let's hope for her sake she gets her head and heart sorted out sooner rather than later.

[aaurora]

Oh my gawwwdd....Poor James. Poor, poor James. It's all well and good to fantasise (James has featured in many of my thoughts, as I am sure Angelina has featured in many of the boys thoughts on this forum) but to the point where it takes over your life and you sit there pining away for a man that doesn't know you (and probably wouldn't want to) is very sad.

Do you think it's for real? Seems a strange thing to write in asking for help for.

[lePobz]

If this wasn't making you so unhappy I'd tell you to enjoy the dreams and hope you run into a man with similar driving skills.

Since when did he get any driving skills?

Sorry James! I kid!

[SuperStalin]

She should develop a heroin addiction, that would cure the James May obsession.
*it helped me

[NooDle]

they published my letter!

[Mercury]

"I am a 40-year-old, professional, intelligent, attractive and, up to this point, emotionally stable Christian woman"

I thought James was single? Why not look him up in some bar, buying him a drink and acting like a normal person? What exactly makes him so "totally unobtainable" ??

Then again, she did just fry herself by sending in that letter.

[LindenChase]

Originally Posted by Mercury

I thought James was single? Why not look him up in some bar, buying him a drink and acting like a normal person? What exactly makes him so "totally unobtainable" ??

The woman does sound like she is in need for some serious counceling, but she has got a point in saying he's not "on the market". James isn't single, he's had the same girlfriend for about eight years now.

[fbc]

Originally Posted by Mineworksfine

You have to have a certain sympathy for the poor lady. Let's hope for her sake she gets her head and heart sorted out sooner rather than later.

True. It's sad when people become obsessed like that - hopefully she'll get the help she needs.

[Richmondgal]

Yeah, it's quite sad that this sort of stuff happens but luckily there is always help. Obsessions can be scary most times.

[Rumer]

Wonder if this will make its way into the upcoming series? After all, he did win Heat's weird crush.. what, last year? I have a hard time believing that Richard and Jeremy would pass up an opportunity like this to gang up on James.

To the woman's credit, she at least recognizes she has a problem. It's the ones who don't that end up doing something scary.

[Momentum57]

Well I am from the school of thought that says don't include Christian unless there is some danger of being confused with a cult member. Women have this occur through out there life part of hormonal and chemical balancing, my sister married with three children and an "emotionally stable Christian woman" had a crush on Don Rumsfeld.

[mclarensmps]

^ That's just downright disturbing

[Censport]

...but men are never as witty or intelligent as him.

Well, he does set a high standard. Glad I don't have to compete with him.

[MattD1zzl3]

Its easy to mock, but i feel so bad for this woman, maybe she's been through hard times (ex husband maybe? Age? Economic stress?) and this super rich and famous fantasy is her way of coping, of imagining her way into a better life, i'm sure we've all briefly done the same at one point or another.

Its a fine line between a daydream, a fantasy and a life destroying obsession, and i wish her the best of luck, and she should talk to someone about this. (if its possible this woman is on the forums, its worth saying).

[BlaRo]

Wow, and I thought my man-crush on Edward Norton crush on Keira Knightley was bad. (At least that's what I tell myself when I realized I sat through Bend It Like Beckham. )

Originally Posted by NooDle

they published my letter!

[Hana.]

That is just intense and to send it in to a paper to get published is odd