Clarkson: What cars should JC destroy?

Donington · November 12th, 2008, 2:57 PM

As we all know, Jeremy and Top Gear love blowing up rubbish cars as much as they do driving great ones around twisty roads. However in recent years it's happened to some cars that didn't deserve it, such as the Alpine.

So..what crappy car would you like to see Jezza pack with tons of pyrotechnics and send launching into a caravan with cheesy eighties guitar music in the background on his next DVD?

Added points come with your own methods of destruction images/smilies/wink.gif

vikiradTG2007 · November 12th, 2008, 3:02 PM

Bad news! The Dacia Sandero will be destroyed by being thrown by a catapult into a barn full of manure!

Mineworksfine · November 12th, 2008, 3:16 PM

Any Ssangyong put through a giant shredder such that it resembles a plate of spaghetti, covered in spherically crushed Nissan Micras (meatballs) and grated gold Rover 25 (parmesan) before being covered with a huge dollop of brake fluid and diesel and flambeed!

vikiradTG2007 · November 12th, 2008, 3:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mineworksfine

Any Ssangyong put through a giant shredder such that it resembles a plate of spaghetti, covered in spherically crushed Nissan Micras (meatballs) and grated gold Rover 25 (parmesan) before being covered with a huge dollop of brake fluid and diesel and flambeed!

Damn, I can't +rep you.

James May's Hair · November 12th, 2008, 4:55 PM

I'd like to see Jeremy insert a Volkswagen Beetle into Tiff Needle. I'd then like to see Tiff Needle inserted into a Citroën Xara. I'd then like to stand and watch - whilst drinking a 1992 Bollinger - in the company of Penelope Cruz, Caterina Murino and James May. Laughing, joking and generally discussing the impending demise of two despicable cars and one despicable supposed racing driver in a hilarious fireball of death.

Leaving James to discuss the finer points on the the Bollinger (champagne ponce) I drive away in an Aston Martin with Penelope and Caterina to a hotel, for an evening of adult fun (with strawberry yoghurt and a banana).

Cheers.

LeVeL · November 12th, 2008, 5:15 PM

a veyron

jack_christie · November 12th, 2008, 5:18 PM

Black cabs. Should nuke at least 100 to start with. As awful as caravans.

Think he should stay away from red double deckers for obvious reasons.

predator101 · November 12th, 2008, 5:25 PM

Buses.

I know he has destroyed one, but it isn't enough.. They plague the lives of motorists everyday, so one should be burnt everyday....

nate_bartlet · November 12th, 2008, 5:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeVeL

a veyron

blasphemer! cast out the heathen! images/smilies/tongue.gif

Seasonone · November 12th, 2008, 5:31 PM

8c

Wyvern · November 12th, 2008, 5:40 PM

A Kia Sedona, if only because of that bloody annoying parking brake. Hitch it to a caravan full of explosives and park it facing uphill on a slope with a conveniently placed wall at the bottom. Then, if that brake should fail, the whole thing would roll backwards, but the wall would stop the caravan and the car would plough on into it... with an effect much like this - images/smilies/blowup.gif

Mr. Nice · November 12th, 2008, 6:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wyvern

A Kia Sedona, if only because of that bloody annoying parking brake. Hitch it to a caravan full of explosives and park it facing uphill on a slope with a conveniently placed wall at the bottom. Then, if that brake should fail, the whole thing would roll backwards, but the wall would stop the caravan and the car would plough on into it... with an effect much like this - images/smilies/blowup.gif

I was thinking the same thing!!!! The rear brakes on those things basically do nothing. The transmissions go bad, and when the cars are new the fuel pump makes strange noises. I feel lucky that I don't have the misfortune of owning one of those.

I think they should just fill the car with explosives, park it on a hill with the parking brake on, and let gravity do the rest! images/smilies/lol.gif

go4gr8 · November 12th, 2008, 6:14 PM

You're forgetting the obvious:

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:5ZGA3JI21g0gdM:http://www.crunchgear.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/toyota_prius.jpg

Mineworksfine · November 12th, 2008, 7:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by James May's Hair

I'd like to see a Volkswagen Beetle inserted into Tiff Needle. I'd then like to see Tiff Needle inserted into a Renault Scenic Picasso. I'd then like to stand and watch - whilst drinking a 1992 Bollinger - in the company of Penelope Cruz, Caterina Murino and James May. Laughing, joking and generally discussing the impending demise of two despicable cars and one despicable supposed racing driver in a hilarious fireball of death.

Leaving James to discuss the finer points on the the Bollinger (champagne ponce) I drive away in an Aston Martin with Penelope and Caterina to a hotel, for an evening of adult fun (with strawberry yoghurt and a banana).

Cheers.

He's also available for children's parties, weddings and Bar Mitzvahs by the way.

Flick Montana · November 12th, 2008, 8:38 PM

A Kia Rio. I was clipped by one on the interstate once. Caused me to spin out onto the grassy median. That having been said, I'd be all for them taking a minigun to one.

ahpadt · November 12th, 2008, 8:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by go4gr8

You're forgetting the obvious:

Already done.

jack_christie · November 12th, 2008, 8:45 PM

Can't remember him demolishing a G-Whiz?

Mineworksfine · November 12th, 2008, 8:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ahpadt

Already done.

That may be, but there's plenty more of the little fuckers out there. One less Prius is a result, several thousand less? That's progress.

Rumer · November 12th, 2008, 8:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jack_christie

Can't remember him demolishing a G-Whiz?

Look for his Good, Bad, and Ugly video. It doesn't get demolished, per se, but it does get destroyed.

mu51im · November 12th, 2008, 9:21 PM

A nissan micra, hate its oily guts.
Also maybe a toyota avensis, every one i see is a taxi.

November 12th, 2008, 2:57 PM	#1
Donington Joined: Jan 26th, 2007 Last Online: 11:16 PM Location: Royston Vasey, Englandshire Posts: 4,571 Rep Power: 222	What cars should JC destroy? As we all know, Jeremy and Top Gear love blowing up rubbish cars as much as they do driving great ones around twisty roads. However in recent years it's happened to some cars that didn't deserve it, such as the Alpine. So..what crappy car would you like to see Jezza pack with tons of pyrotechnics and send launching into a caravan with cheesy eighties guitar music in the background on his next DVD? Added points come with your own methods of destruction __________________ "I love the smell of CGI in the morning"

November 12th, 2008, 3:02 PM	#2
vikiradTG2007 Joined: Feb 8th, 2007 Last Online: 8:08 PM Location: The People's Republic of Socialist Romanistan Age: 18 Posts: 7,521 Car: Ford Focus MkI 1.8D Rep Power: 162	Bad news! The Dacia Sandero will be destroyed by being thrown by a catapult into a barn full of manure! __________________ Red 5 is alive!

November 12th, 2008, 3:16 PM	#3
Mineworksfine Joined: May 29th, 2008 Last Online: 10:42 PM Location: Mineworksfine Towers, Worthing, West Sussex, UK Age: 40 Posts: 2,514 Car: MX-5 1.8i Phoenix SE, Honda Civic 2.0 VTEC Type S Rep Power: 372	Any Ssangyong put through a giant shredder such that it resembles a plate of spaghetti, covered in spherically crushed Nissan Micras (meatballs) and grated gold Rover 25 (parmesan) before being covered with a huge dollop of brake fluid and diesel and flambeed! __________________ WARNING! Posts from Mineworksfine are likely to contain traces of irony. If you believe you may be suffering from an irony deficiency please consult your physician. Mineworksfine and its subsidiaries can not be held responsible for any failure to seek appropriate medical intervention.

November 12th, 2008, 4:55 PM	#5
James May's Hair Banned Joined: Oct 11th, 2006 Last Online: July 5th, 2009 Location: This Scepter'd Isle Posts: 563 Rep Power: 0	I'd like to see Jeremy insert a Volkswagen Beetle into Tiff Needle. I'd then like to see Tiff Needle inserted into a Citroën Xara. I'd then like to stand and watch - whilst drinking a 1992 Bollinger - in the company of Penelope Cruz, Caterina Murino and James May. Laughing, joking and generally discussing the impending demise of two despicable cars and one despicable supposed racing driver in a hilarious fireball of death. Leaving James to discuss the finer points on the the Bollinger (champagne ponce) I drive away in an Aston Martin with Penelope and Caterina to a hotel, for an evening of adult fun (with strawberry yoghurt and a banana). Cheers. Last edited by James May's Hair; November 13th, 2008 at 10:31 AM. Reason: I'm a tit

November 12th, 2008, 5:15 PM	#6
LeVeL Joined: Jun 16th, 2007 Last Online: 12:37 PM Location: MA Age: 21 Posts: 3,874 Car: CG5/F23A1 Rep Power: 172	a veyron __________________ ^Don't worry he's a closet ~~homosexual~~ Miata driver. - Twerp128 Yeah, you're right. You win. You're the man - MacGuffin flickr . . . photography + UMass Motorsport

November 12th, 2008, 5:18 PM	#7
jack_christie Joined: Aug 1st, 2006 Last Online: 9:28 PM Posts: 644 Rep Power: 36	Black cabs. Should nuke at least 100 to start with. As awful as caravans. Think he should stay away from red double deckers for obvious reasons. __________________ Team Black Jack

November 12th, 2008, 5:25 PM	#8
predator101 Joined: Nov 10th, 2007 Last Online: Yesterday Posts: 140 Car: Toyota Yaris, Mazda 3 Rep Power: 19	Buses. I know he has destroyed one, but it isn't enough.. They plague the lives of motorists everyday, so one should be burnt everyday.... __________________ "That's what it is, it's a dinosaur politely chuckling", Jeremy Clarkson.

November 12th, 2008, 5:31 PM	#10
Seasonone Joined: Jun 30th, 2008 Last Online: March 22nd, 2009 Location: Portland, Oregon USA Age: 26 Posts: 958 Car: RB25 "silvia" Rep Power: 0	8c

November 12th, 2008, 5:40 PM	#11
Wyvern Not A Dude Joined: Oct 3rd, 2008 Last Online: March 13th, 2010 Location: Loughton, Essex Age: 36 Posts: 465 Car: Triumph Herald 1200, not quite as broken as it was Rep Power: 204	A Kia Sedona, if only because of that bloody annoying parking brake. Hitch it to a caravan full of explosives and park it facing uphill on a slope with a conveniently placed wall at the bottom. Then, if that brake should fail, the whole thing would roll backwards, but the wall would stop the caravan and the car would plough on into it... with an effect much like this - Last edited by Wyvern; November 12th, 2008 at 5:43 PM.

November 12th, 2008, 6:14 PM	#13
go4gr8 Joined: Jul 29th, 2008 Last Online: February 13th, 2010 Location: Maine, USA Posts: 72 Car: 2002 Sanitary (V) Towel Focus Rep Power: 7	You're forgetting the obvious:

November 12th, 2008, 8:38 PM	#15
Flick Montana Banned Joined: Sep 15th, 2008 Last Online: September 3rd, 2009 Location: Aloha, Oregon. USA Posts: 104 Car: 04 Nissan 350Z Roadster, 09 Nissan GT-R Rep Power: 0	A Kia Rio. I was clipped by one on the interstate once. Caused me to spin out onto the grassy median. That having been said, I'd be all for them taking a minigun to one.

November 12th, 2008, 8:45 PM	#17
jack_christie Joined: Aug 1st, 2006 Last Online: 9:28 PM Posts: 644 Rep Power: 36	Can't remember him demolishing a G-Whiz? __________________ Team Black Jack

November 12th, 2008, 9:21 PM	#20
mu51im Joined: Aug 24th, 2008 Last Online: December 28th, 2009 Posts: 47 Car: RR Phantom. In My Mind. Rep Power: 7	A nissan micra, hate its oily guts. Also maybe a toyota avensis, every one i see is a taxi.

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