Which Hosts Do You Want Back for Series Two?

Which Hosts Do You Want Back for Series Two?

  • Total voters
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Before the start of season two Charlie needs to be chained naked, covered in honey and feathers to a tree on the main highway 17km out of Euchuca. And then left there*.

I'm glad 60% of everyone agrees with me.

(* We meant to do this to a mate on his Buck's night, but after a day of dirt biking we were all too buggered and had an early night instead. Too good an idea to waste, really...)
 
News has just come to hand. The papers are quoting Charlie Cox as saying:

"Wikkedsnaab suggests I should be "chained naked, covered in honey and feathers to a tree on the main highway 17km out of Euchuca. And then left there."

Come on son, I've already done that! In fact, I own that road. Actually, I think I built it in my spare time. And as for being covered in honey and feathers... that also bores me to tears, just like being the central host on Top Gear Australia.

So I think I'll just put you down with crappy one-liners, look unamused, make sure I come first, put you down with another crappy one-liner while wearing a disinterested and supercilious grin... then I'll go back to being as interesting as a dead wombat. That'll fix your wagon."

Ah. Charlie. Please go away.
 
Newsflash!!!!

The papers now report:

"Top Gear Australia host Charlie Cox has just been rescued by emergency workers who found him chained naked to a tree and covered in honey and feathers somewhere on the main highway 17km out of Euchuca.

After being revived and wrapped in a Cox-Industries Insecurity Blanket, the television host slowly came back to consciousness.

An Emergency Services spokesman said he knew Cox was alright as soon as he began referring to the ambulance crews as 'Son'.

Cox assures viewers he will be back to bore them rigid soon."
 
Keep all of them, but move the big studio stuff, like SIABSC, to Warren. Charlie's getting there, but he's miscast in his current role and Warren has turned out to be a real gem. Steve's improved massively since episode 1, so I'm more than happy for him to stay put. I agree with the suggestion that if there's still a problem at the end of series 2 (*ahem*Charlie*ahem*), look at it again. He's not completely in fish out of water territory, but I think the expectation that he would be the "Australian Clarkson" is a bit of a mistake. He doesn't need to be an Australian Clarkson, he needs to be Charlie Cox. Once we've seen what he's really like, it will be easier to say whether he should stay or go.

I'm for giving all of 'em another shot :)
 
Charlie, and to a lesser extent Steve, are still troubling me but are getting better with each episode. I agree that the hosting duties should be shared between Charlie and Warren though. If on of them had to go it would be Charlie but I'd say give him another season.

Basically just keep churning through the hosts until they offer me a job doing it and then it will be perfect. I can test Zimmer frames with the best of them. :wicked:
 
Aston Martin said:
Shoot Boycie in the middle of his talentless face and i'm happy.
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With such a poor sense of .... humor? .... delivery?... whatever... I'd be happier if you kept your comments on this thread a bit further away from the psychopathic thanks very much. It gives Aston Martin a bad name. And they are among my favourite cars.

:blink:
 
Warren has what it takes - the Peking to Paris showed that. His use of cartoons in lieu of a translator was brilliant.
I'd still prefer Charlie gone, but if he has to stay, get him off the intro, and for heaven's sake, Please! don't let him interview guests.
 
I voted to keep Warren, he seems to be the guy who closest reflects a bit of Aussie humour.
He has more confidence in himself, much more than the other two women.

If they keep the same lineup, then Series 2 shouldnt have any appointed "leader" because none of them seem up to it.
Just let the guys do their stuff and they will naturally sort out who takes the lead. (if at all) They will work out the chemistry if they are given a few years.
On the other hand this isnt a school play either, theres big money involved and if they keep getting it wrong , it'll just cease to exist because its plainly unpopular.
So it cant continue being poor television while the guys sort themselves out.
Viewers want to be entertained NOW, not watch you learn your craft as the years go by....

It needs resusitation before it returns.

So I think the S2 lineup should be Warren, Bolly and Tone76.
Occaisionally bring on a few experts to add some 'light and dark' to the mix, a few lady drivers..

and Stiggie can be the crash test dummy.
 
Warren is just natural, doesn't have to do any "acting" or script reading as he's just plain himself and that makes him believable, the other two seem to think they must raise their voice when they shouldn't, they "overact" everything, they read out a script and put emphasis on things they shouldn't, every word just comes out forced and timed all wrong.

While I voted for Warren only I (as a big critic of Cox) honestly believe even he can do the job, he's just trying way too hard to be something he isn't but he's definitely got to come of his high horse, we don't care about put downs and "I'm better than you Warren" cause he might think he is but on screen he's the try hard. He comes accross as an obnoxious ass at best :-/
Steve.. donno, there's something too forced too, like the GTR review, he thinks it's the greatest car but only as a professional driver, not as a person.
This makes him the "pro" telling me his verdict which just is the fifth gear way. (and therefore obnoxious, boring, I'm better than you etc etc..)
Top gear presenters should have pure passion and show some believable emotion.
 
STIG_mata said:
It needs resusitation before it returns.

So I think the S2 lineup should be Warren, Bolly and Tone76.
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Awwww. Shucks. Thanks for the vote of confidence STIG_mata, but I doubt I'd make it past the current gatekeepers of mediocrity. For starters, they'd have to allow the show to be far more un-PC before I'd get on board.

But I'm free to discuss it after I finish my next big-budget feature film. We're just wrapping up the shoot in Burkina Faso now actually. Have their agent speak with my agent and we'll organise to do lunch while deciding where to do dinner and which car to drive before we do brunch.

:D
 
bolly said:
Awwww. Shucks. Thanks for the vote of confidence STIG_mata, but I doubt I'd make it past the current gatekeepers of mediocrity. For starters, they'd have to allow the show to be far more un-PC before I'd get on board.

And THATS EXACTLY where TGAU shot itself in the scrotum.

Too PC, from talent to scripts and beyooond..

Being PC is for govt types who bring their lunches to work, or sissies from school with long memories who take it upon themselves to right the worlds wrongs by building a paper fortress that just paralyses a society.
Thanks for that pinheads !!

TGUK is a long established beacon of UN-PC, it welcomes taking the piss, sabotage against your friends, smashing stuff,sly farting in a lift, speaking your mind, excessive drinking, and copious flatulence. Sorry , thats just my favourite.
And just a bit of gratuitous car porn so people remember its a car show., can I rebore your cylinders Luv ??
With PC, its beige, but why PC a show with such great UN-PC heritage??
Have a look at the other SBS shows where its all tits and fuck you, ehtnic slurs and foul-mouthed dwarfs.
TGAU doesnt need to go THAT far into the toilet to get jokes, but it has no testicles AT ALL.
THATS why its ratings are pissweak.


But I'm free to discuss it after I finish my next big-budget feature film.

Well you wont have too much acting opposition if Baz's's latest film is anything to go by.....

Nicole has bleached her whole body of colour and specialises in still life acting.
And the best person for the female lead role would have been Hugh,
or maybe Keith Urban.

We're just wrapping up the shoot in Burkina Faso now actually. Have their agent speak with my agent and we'll organise to do lunch while deciding where to do dinner and which car to drive before we do brunch.

Thats why youre a good choice Bolly, youve already got the slick lingo worked out.


:D
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F*#%! I think I've just blown my chance to ever get a hosting job on Top Gear Australia then. You see, I had to get my skin bleached for my leading role on the film shooting in Burkina Faso. It helped me blend in with the locals.

Damn! Guess I'll just have to stick to working on B-Grade Hollywood movies.

;)
 
STIG_mata said:
So I think the S2 lineup should be Warren, Bolly and Tone76.
Click to expand...

:rofl:

If you wanted +1 from me, you should have just asked! I'm assuming you didn't see my video on YouTube, then ... ;)
 
Warren & Steve. Charlie is too annoying.
 
Warren and Steve FTW!

I reckon warren should be the main presenter, not charlie. Let him do the SIABSC as well
i guess i could maybe get used to charlie if he wasnt so 'in your face' all the time

Also, Keep up the great cartoons Warren - they're hilarious!
 
"Resigned" or pushed? Given Charlie's popularity on this poll, you'd have to wonder. Either way, good riddance!

And Stiggie... you have some hair to eat. :cry:
 
I'd say resigned. Everyone knows how much stuff he does so it's probably true that he didn't have time for it.
 
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