Kill a dream

granted. You're no longer single, and you cheat on your wife by having sex with random men.

I wish I wasn't so full
 
Granted, you're starving to death on the streets of Ethiopia.

I wish I had some money.
 
granted, but as it's now over 11 hours later, it's not going to make much of a difference

I wish I knew at 15 what I now know at 30 something
 
Granted, but because you have such knowledge a terrorist group hunts you down and kills you.

I wish I had the courage to just ask the guy that I like out.
 
granted, and he says yes (you now have to endure the stress of waiting for the date)

I wish Punkt would judge his competition - What's the Question?
 
Granted, but he's corrupt and only lets himself win.

I wish I knew what the question was.
 
Granted, but it's "Is that a bomb?" And it is. And it's lit.

I wish I could win an FG Wacky Race.
 
Sorry, but that wish is ungrantable.

I wish.
EDIT: I wish for unlimited wishes like this kid.
 
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Granted, you wish that wish was grantable, which American TG Man becomes the most successful driver in Wacky Racing, ruining it for the rest of us since we no longer have any chance of winning.

I wish for a USB memory stick.
 
Granted, but its broken. ((I know, that's lame. The creative juices are frozen solid today.))

I wish that I didn't have so many phobias of silly things.
 
^^It has a computer virus that causes your computer to brainwash your mind and turn you in to a slave of VonSmythe Industrie. (I had to make one up since xicedlovexoxo is out of creativity ;) )

^Granted, you just have one phobia: the fear of air. It doesn't end well.

I wish I would have done a bit better on my history final.
 
granted, teacher now thinks you cheated

I wish for The Onion access at work
 
Granted, but your boss finds you on it and
youre-fired.jpg


I wish for a microphone for my ipod.
 
Granted, but your friends find it and fill your iPod up with "Sounds from the Public Lavvies of The World"

I wish to be otherwise employed
 
Granted, but you work for Bill Oddie...and he makes you tape animal porn for his own personal indulgement...there's a reason his last name's "Oddie"

I wish for more sweet Hawaiian rolls. Mmm..
 
Granted, but they taste just like normal bread rolls, as they should (and I hear you're not hungry any more).

I wish away my finals.
 
Granted, your school is about to completely abolish finals, but then you move somewhere else and have to deal with them all over again without even knowing what's going on in any of your classes because you're new.

I wish I didn't have to worry about college.
 
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