The weekly Times Online car review by Jeremy-thread

Can I +1 Jeremy?
 
I'm sorry I have to double post.

But this was brilliant.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/driving/jeremy_clarkson/greatest_hits/article3289892.ece

So brilliant in fact, that I'm going to have to post it here.
Jeremy Clarkson said:
Environmentalists look at the gun, the car and the jet engine as instruments of Satan, but the mosquito has killed more than all three put together.

Eco-mentalists don?t want us all to be rich. They want us all to be poor. The level of carbon dioxide they want us to produce cannot be achieved with just a slight lifestyle shift. It will require a total abandonment of central heating, air-conditioning, supermarkets, transport, global trade, airlines, everything. Not even Arthur Scargill wanted that.

News reports always say global warming scientists ?have found that...? This makes it a fact. Whereas BP and Shell ?claim that...? Which makes it seem like a lie. Subtle, but it works.

Amazingly, it turns out you can make a global warming film that contains nine proven factual inaccuracies. And they?ll give you a Nobel peace prize.

It makes not the slightest difference if Johnny tiger dies out. It won?t upset our power supplies or heal the rift with Russia. It is as irrelevant as the death of a faraway star.

These eco-people are the sort who were bullied at school. They have poor dress sense, limited social skills and they know they stand little chance of making much headway in the world, so they want it changed.

In Wales every single south or westerly facing escarpment is being smothered in wind farms. Giant tubular bird mincers that whir and moan 24 hours a day and eventually, after a year or so, produce just enough energy to light up Mrs Llewellyn?s bedside lamp.

They?re not called Trots and Bolsheviks any more. They?re called environmentalists and health and safety officers. A single health and safety man can inflict more damage on business and industry than an army of Red Robboes.

You must learn to blank out the eco noise in the same way people who suffer from tinnitus learn over time to blank out the whistle.

My wife bought me a patio heater for our wedding anniversary, and I?ve always been nervous about it. Now I know such things annoy Greenpeace, I shall keep it lit 24 hours a day.
Click to expand...
 
Fiorano said:
I liked the article, but if you got rid of the Labour party, there would just be the conservatives....... *shudder*
Click to expand...

and the lib dems.
 
and the Scot Nats and Sinn fein and Plaid Cymru. ...

Fiorano

well the other two main ones are crap too.

I am so optimistic about the political future - NOT!
 
Last edited:
Cobol74 said:
and the Scot Nats and Sinn fein and Plaid Cymru. ...

Fiorano

well the other two main ones are crap too.

I am so optimistic about the political future - NOT!
Click to expand...

Is my username offensive? or just rubbish?

Yeah, my point was why get rid of one party when they all suck?
 
And the sound is worse. The Honda?s petrol engine is a much-shaved, built-for-economy, low-friction 1.3 that, at full chat, makes a noise worse than someone else?s crying baby on an airliner. It?s worse than the sound of your parachute failing to open. Really, to get an idea of how awful it is, you?d have to sit a dog on a ham slicer.
Click to expand...

Bloody brilliant.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MWF
Hmm, the general motoring press for more forgiving of the Insight.

Great article to read though.
 
I recently bought something called a Black Widow slingshot. It?s a catapult that fires ball bearings with devastating force. I was very much looking forward to blatting a few pigeons with it. But I cannot get through the plastic case in which it was sold. Scissors just break. My Strimmer became jammed. And dynamite is ineffective. I would very much like to meet the man who chose to seal his product this way, and kill him.
Click to expand...

JC is just on fire this week!
 
He missed a couple things on the Insight. The dash plastic comes from the reject bin behind Wal Mart, the speedo is cut off by the steering wheel and impossible to read, and it's wobbly. It's not so much that the ride is woeful, but it seems to be shifting side to side ever so slightly as you go. An odd, entirely unpleasant sensation. I drove one the other day, not a good car.
 
2Billion said:
It's not so much that the ride is woeful, but it seems to be shifting side to side ever so slightly as you go. An odd, entirely unpleasant sensation. I drove one the other day, not a good car.
Click to expand...

Wow! My first car, a Hyundai Accent, does that... How could Honda go down to the level of Hyundai's lowest, most horrible car? :(
 
2Billion said:
He missed a couple things on the Insight. The dash plastic comes from the reject bin behind Wal Mart, the speedo is cut off by the steering wheel and impossible to read, and it's wobbly. It's not so much that the ride is woeful, but it seems to be shifting side to side ever so slightly as you go. An odd, entirely unpleasant sensation. I drove one the other day, (purely for research purposes you understand)not a good car.
Click to expand...

FTFY. Would hate to see you banned from here for driving a hybrid for no good reason.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top