Busted for speeding: What's your best excuse?

Blind_Io said:
The only ticket I ever got out of was here in Salt Lake when I got pulled over for "Almost running a red light."
I said, "I'm not sure that 'almost' breaking the law is a citable offense, sir. The last time I read the traffic code it identified running a red light as entering the intersection on a red. You said my rear wheels were still in the intersection when the light changed to red, so I couldn't have been entering the intersection at the same time I was leaving the intersection. Has the traffic code changed recently?"
"Well...um... in my book the tie goes to the runner."
"Am I free to go, officer?"
He just starts walking back to his car at this point, waving his hand over his shoulder and mutters, "yeah."
"Thank you, Officer. Drive safe!" *Roll up window* "Jackass."
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My friend got pulled over for "running a yellow light" while I was with him once. :lol:

Now, if I were to get a ticket in the Mustang I'd just be honest and say the speedo is wonky and doesn't work properly all the time, it is 40 years old after all.
 
tone76 said:
The best one I've seen is from a billboard with some road safety propaganda on it just north of Adelaide.

The billboard featured a police officer pointing a laser gun and it had the tagline "Speeding: What's Your Excuse?". Underneath this tagline, someone had graffitied 'need a crap'. :lol:

There were pictures of this on the internet a few years back.
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Billboard_Speeding_Whats_Your_Excuse.jpg


:lol:
 
Sir, are you aware of how fast you were going?

FOURTEEN KILOS OF HEROIN!
 
Labcoatguy said:
Are you sure about points not transferring? If so, that's great; I got done for speeding in NY last weekend and really don't want to go and fight it.
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Check with your DMV I know that NYS doesn't take points unless they are from Ontario (for some reason).
I'm pretty sure MA wouldn't care about NYS tickets but check.
 
Crazyjeeper said:
Not best, but most smartass would be:

"I don't know how fast I was going, because I was looking at the road, not the speedometer."
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that's what I normally would say, but with a serious face, instead of joking around.

saying anything stupid/funny or just acting like an arse (like many examples from this thread) will usually get you nowhere. cops are idiots, and most of them have no sense of humour.
 
Blind_Io said:
The only ticket I ever got out of was here in Salt Lake when I got pulled over for "Almost running a red light."
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Now as you're talking about it... and i earlier asked about the speeding fines.

What is the fine for running a red light?

Here you lose your license for a month when it has been red for more than 1 second. Also have to pay 200?.

At least as long nobody is endangered by your action. If that's the case.. it gets more expensive.
 
Blind_Io said:
In my experience, telling the cop that you know you broke the law doesn't get you anywhere, but a really good excuse that makes him laugh or shows a superior knowledge of the law usually will.
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In my experience not getting caught at all is the best way!!
I've never been done for speeding! \o/

Or any traffic violation for that matter, not even a parking ticket!
 
Quote my aunt: "But officer! My ice cream was melting!"
 
"I voted yes on that police levy that gave you the funding for those new cruisers and I was just out doing a quality assurance run to make sure the taxpayers got our money's worth. I'm happy to report that it appears we did!"

Or if that fails:

"I'm on a mission from God."
 
idk said:
Now as you're talking about it... and i earlier asked about the speeding fines.

What is the fine for running a red light?

Here you lose your license for a month when it has been red for more than 1 second. Also have to pay 200?.

At least as long nobody is endangered by your action. If that's the case.. it gets more expensive.
Click to expand...

Running a red light is a 50 point violation in Utah, by comparison, reckless driving is 80 points.

The actual fine varies by court jurisdiction, so I can't say for the whole state. Judges can vary the fine by 10% (I think) on some violations. The fine also goes up if you have a shit driving record, so if you have a 75 point speeding ticket you will pay more than if you had a clean record. Also, you can pay the fine, plead guilty and pay to go to traffic school; if you can keep your record clean after that for 12-18 months (depending on the severity of the ticket), the charge is wiped from your record and never reported to insurance.

From my quick Google-Fu, it looks like the base fine for disobeying a "traffic control device" (signs or lights, I think) is $90.
 
Holy crap, guys...3 pages and noone has posted the joke? Next time you are being pulled over, don't pull over right away. Drive for a bit, but then pull over. When the cop asks why you didn't pull over right away, say "My wife left me for a police officer...I though you were trying to give her back."
 
Best excuse, gotta use the bog.

Yes it's probably posted already, sort of was in the first post.
 
This happened when after my doctor saw my leg, he recommended I go to hospital urgently, saw I got in the car and was hammering it down the road when a cop comes up behind me.

Cop: Are you aware that the speed limit here is 60?

Me: Yes.

Cop: Then why were you doing 90 when I clocked you.

Me: "I really need to get medical attention. It's urgent."

Cop: "I don't believe you."

Me: *rolls down dressings revealing my massively disfigured leg which was red swollen and infected*

Cop: Follow me, if you get any tickets from camera's, I'll see to it nothing happens.

So he turned on his siren and escorted me to A & E... sure enough we passed three camera's at high speed and no tickets.
 
One to try for either direction (and don't spoil my ATTEMPT at funny with accurate maths...):

"Do you know how fast you were going?"
"Actual or relative"
"Actual"
"107,138 kph backwards"
"Would you like to clarify that?"
"The Earth spins pretty quickly, and I'm going against the spin"

"Do you know how fast you were going?"
"Actual or relative"
"Actual"
"About 107,298 kph or 83 times the speed of sound"
"Would you like to clarify that?"
"The Earth spins pretty quickly"
 
I can't believe we've all forgotten the best excuse!

"I know I was speeding officer but it's okay, I've got ABS." :clarkson:
 
You can barely sneak out in Germany because the cops are always in pairs....

I got out once with this one:

"Why did you speed away from us?" (I did 90 in a 80 roadworks, big deal, they pulled in my lane and pushed me, so I did 100)
"- Because your headlight adjustment is a complete mess. Your right light is blinding everyone and I wanted it to stop"
*cops look at their car, turn on light*
"Oh.....damn. Well......thanks. Don't do it again."



I normally sneak out of other tickets easier :D

Driving at night, cops laser on side of road, I turn on high beams and he gets slightly blinded
"Why the hell did you turn on high beams in the city?"
- Because I saw some crap and movement on the side of the road and didn't want to run someone over!
"THAT CRAP ARE OUR PYLONS, OUR COP CAR AND OUR LASER GUN"
- So how much did I do
"I didn't measure because you blinded me"
- Sorry :(


My best one so far: I drove on a b-road at night over a crest where there is only one house, WAY too fast, fog lights and high beams on, jumped a bit, cops on the other side of the road behind the crest. Damn.

"Do you know why we are stopping you?"
- Errr......I may have blinded you, sorry.
"Are there any bombers in the air or why do you have your FLAK illumination on?"
- B-Road, there were deer on the road!
"Ok, and were you a bit too fast maybe?"
- How is that? I was cruising along!
"Your left front wheel was in the air"
- Oh yes, I did that so there is no running noise to annoy the people who live here!
*Cop bursts out in laughter, keeps laughing for a minute, unable to say a sentence*
"I will go to my car now. And when I sit down and look in the rear view mirror, I want to see your rear lights disappear in the distance. And fgs drive slowly."
- Have a pleasant night!
 
This one time, when they asked me about it, I just told them "Well, the weather was nice, the road was straight, I had some nice music on and I'm a bit of an idiot." :p
 
once i was driving in what could be called just no traffic jam on a double direction road, and was overtaking cars one at the time...suddenly i see a black primera do the same thing....

ah crap...i immediately knew i was caught. they stopped me, and they started their list of offences.

"you got in your car, started making phonecalls, and in the mean time you were speeding, tailgating people and inside an area 30, passing cars over a full white line. have anything to say about that?"

"nothing valid"

just got a ticket for making phonecalls when behind the wheel

when you're on the road for you work, in a company car, they realy let you get off easy...
 
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