You know, when I read this latest story, for some reason I had an entirely different conversation between Jeremy and Francine go through my head:
Jeremy: *flustered* Sweetheart, don't listen to anything the media is saying. I promise you I have not been having an affair with any of those women!
Francine: *patient smile* "It's okay, I believe you dear. I know you're not having an affair.
Jeremy *relieved* Well good. I'm not like that, you know that. No matter how many women throw themselves at me all the time. You can trust me.
Francine: *rolls her eyes and is bemused* Of course dear. I know that. And I trust you to *snickers* fend off those sad sad women. It's cool.
Jeremy: *a bit confused* Well yeah, thats what I meant. And they do you know. All the time. Tons of women every day. But I'm the good guy.
Francine: *pats him on the head* Yes dear, I know...the tons of women who are all wanting you. It's okay, like I said. I know you're safe. *starts reading a book*
Jeremy: *Flustered and man-hurt* Well, just so you know, I mean, I'm not saying I would ever really have an affair, but...um..if I had wanted to, or had a moment of weakness...it would be easy. I mean look at me. I'm rich and I have a Lamborghini! Tons of women want me! *puts his chest out*
Francine: *still reading her book and not looking up* Yes dear....lots of women want you, you're such a beast...rich and all of that, king of the... Oh look! A sale at Asda this Friday. We should go... Um, what were you saying again?
Jeremy: *shrinking a bit with his chin wibbling* You don't believe me! I mean, not the part about cheating on you! I'd never do that sweetheart! But I could! Um..if I dunno...my manly testosterone was surging, and I had a few beers...all out in a lonely place....and a hot car...and some lady friend...and...you know...It could happen!
*stamps his foot like a 3 year old* I wouldn't want it to happen of course, but...yunno... And you don't believe me!
Francine: *coddling him like an angry child* You sold the Lambo dear. Because it was faster than you could handle in front of your friends. And yes, I believe you about the bit that if you wanted to have an affair, then you would...but *checks her schedule* You have to be here on Monday, there on Tuesday...remember to smile. Then here again by Friday. I'll schedule some time for us to walk on the beach....*trails off still reading Jeremy his schedule for the next 3 weeks*
Jeremy: *sniffs* Why wont anyone believe that I could have an affair with a beautiful woman if I wanted to? *sniffs* I could...*kicks a rock over with his toe* I've seen it done in the movies....and what? *listens* Yes dear! I'll be right there dear! Only take me a minute dear...