BBC lawyers fight The Stig's bid to lift lid on his identity

Gingertom

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Sniff Petrol (A.K.A. Script editor, Richard Porter) just posted this on the Sniff website:
Sniff Petrol said:
The BBC today threatened legal action to prevent the publication of an autobiography by a small grey plastic chair used in the Top Gear office.

The chair, which has been with the popular BBC2 programme for almost seven years, is believed to have become jealous of the financial rewards Top Gear?s success has brought to other members of the team including presenters Jeremy Clarkson, who claimed to have earned ?literally 47 billion million pounds last week?, and James May, who recently managed to sell a Haynes manual for a Triumph 2000/2500 on eBay for over ?14.

Exact details of the chair have always remained a mystery with some reports suggesting that Top Gear actually uses more than one chair in this role.

?We do not discuss furniture matters such as this,? said a BBC spokesperson earlier today. ?But chairs are quite easy to replace especially if the old one doesn?t understand what a contract means, the thick twat.?

The plastic chair, yesterday
 

Momo63

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The same story is now also being reported by more serious news sources such as The Daily Telegraph, The Guardian and the Press Association. :hmm:


It came from PA in the first place.
Someone is also trying to tout pictures of the guy who wore the Stig suit for the award ceremonies that he turned up to (forget which) who everytone knew wasn't the real guy but just a BBC employee. :mad:
 

ninjacoco

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So.... new model Stig? Pink suit, possibly female? :D Speaks Doesn't speak with a heavy German slight Texan accent, maybe?

Speaks?!?!?!
FTFSpectre.

- Vice President of Puffalumps, "equiraptor for Stig #3" campaign

Nobody'd expect it if it's put out there, like, now, right?
 

Amie8

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The same story is now also being reported by more serious news sources such as The Daily Telegraph, The Guardian and the Press Association.

As were the "presenters threaten to quit" and "Clarkson trousers six million pounds of licence payers' money" stories.

Has anybody said he's actually written this autobiography, or is it just a theory?
 

Bunji

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I dunno, a Stigson autobiography sounds pretty neat. He could call it "How I Drive Around in a Figure of Eight in Cars. A Lot."
 

HaggisHill

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I'd love to read Stig's Story, and his nerdy personal insights into high-performance driving. It would sound a neat book. With the racing career and 8-ish years of TopGear cluster-fuckery anecdotes to share, how would that not be a good read ?

It's a pity the whole "identity" thing might doom him to an ending, flung into a volcano.

If Jezza can trot-out a book-per-year... surely... The Almighty Stigster can publish some gems without a P45 being involved ?

Pesky Lawyers.
 

GerFix

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If this whole story really is true, it isn't about (BBC) lawyers trying to suppress The Stig's story. This biography isn't going to be how he was forged from a mixture of kevlar, titanium, carbon-fiber and old plastic shopping bags and spent the first 10 years of his existence dumped outside an F1 workshop being urinated on by engineers until it was clear that he was tough enough proceed to the next phase of his creation.

This biography is going to be how some bloke who dresses up as The Stig went to Watneys Red Barrel Comprehensive, got an O level in Donuts and replaced the front suspension bushes on his mothers 1983 Ford Fiesta whilst suspended from school for flicking the bra strap of the schools rugby captain.

It will no more be the story of The Stig than the biography of the guy who dresses up as Father Christmas at your local shopping mall is the story of Santa Claus.
 

Karynella

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If this whole story really is true, it isn't about (BBC) lawyers trying to suppress The Stig's story. This biography isn't going to be how he was forged from a mixture of kevlar, titanium, carbon-fiber and old plastic shopping bags and spent the first 10 years of his existence dumped outside an F1 workshop being urinated on by engineers until it was clear that he was tough enough proceed to the next phase of his creation.

now THAT would make a good book.
 

GerFix

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You make me smile, GerFix. ^^

Like Clarkson, I do wake up in the morning hoping I will have a laugh during the day. :)

After adapting the Lord's Prayer, I thought I'd turn my hand to poetry. I'm not a big poetry fan, but I do like Milton's On Time ... so I thought I'd give that the Stig treatment ... given the ongoing Stig discussions it probably isn't too OT to post:

FLY furious Stig, till thou run out thy race,
Call on the lazy flappy-paddle box,
Whose shift speed is but the heavy Plummets pace;
And glut thy self with what thy engine devours,
Which is no more then what is high octane,
And exhaust note so sweet;
So nimble are thy feet,
So analogue is thy brain.
For when as each Koenigsegg thou hast entomb'd,
And last of all, thy Veyron Supersports consum'd,
Then long Eternity shall greet our bliss
With a blow-off valve hiss;
And Joy shall overtake us with any luck,
When you learn a correct fact about a duck
And perfectly divine,
With poise, and Pace, and racing line
About the Top Gear test track
In cars, pr'pared by Steve of builder's crack,
When once 'Gear Live's their only gig,
Then all this cocking has quit,
Attir'd with Rubens, we shall for ever sit,
Triumphing over ambitious, and rubbish, and thee O Stig.


Since a couple of people have commented on my avatar, I thought I'd post the big version of that too. Edvard Munch called it The Scream .. don't know what to call this version .... maybe The Screech :dunno:
 

Cowboy

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Ow please.....if the stig ever wrote his biography it would simply look like this:


101000111011100111011100110011001100011110001001010101011100100
101011101110011101110011001100110001111000100101010101110011011
001000111011100111011100110011001100011110001001010101011100100
101011101110011101110011001100110001111000100101010101110011011
 

LindenChase

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I think the whole story is quite credible to be honest. Quoting the Telegraph:

The stunt driver is now understood to have written a draft of a book detailing his experiences on the show and found a publisher willing to print it.

Hammond has been doing exactly the same for the last couple of years. So "Stig" has decided to write his own book and earn some extra cash. It will likely cost him his job, but maybe he was planning to leave anyway. No big deal, next series there will be a different man in the Santa Stig suit. It will still be Santa Stig. ;)
 

Momo63

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I think the whole story is quite credible to be honest. Quoting the Telegraph:



Hammond has been doing exactly the same for the last couple of years. So "Stig" has decided to write his own book and earn some extra cash. It will likely cost him his job, but maybe he was planning to leave anyway. No big deal, next series there will be a different man in the Santa Stig suit. It will still be Santa Stig. ;)


It's only one of the Stigs that's going to do this anyway - presumably the one that has "met" all the celebs while keeping behind the visor the whole time.
*shrugs* So what?
 

matskulainen

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I'm quite confident I, and a lot of others here, already know who is *the* The Stig, and most of the other special Stigs have been "revealed" as well. I couldn't care less who wears the suit and drives the cars as we will never (hopefully) see his face anyway.

I don't care if it's
Spoiler Text: (Click here to toggle display)
Ben Collins,
Michael Schumacher, James May or Tony Blair.

If "The Stig" writes and publishes the book and reveals himself, then I hope the BBC and Top Gear admit nothing and just get a new guy. As long as the character The Stig stays there and stays the same, I don't give a shit.
 
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