and read this while the video downloads...
:GEORGE W. BUSH RESUME
:
:ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
:
:I attacked and took over two countries.
:I spent the U.S. surplus and bankrupted the Treasury.
:I shattered the record for the biggest annual deficit in history.
:I set an economic record for the most private bankruptcies filed in any 12
:month period.
:I set all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the stock
:market.
:I am the first president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
:I am the first president in US history to enter office with a criminal
:record.
:In my first year in office I set the all-time record for most days on
:vacation by any president in US history.
:After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, I presided over
:the worst security failure in US history.
:I set the record for most campaign fund raising trips by any president in US
:history.
:In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
:I cut unemployment benefits for more out-of-work Americans than any other
resident in US history.
:I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
:I appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any
resident in US history.
:I set the record for the fewest press conferences of any president since the
:advent of TV.
:I signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any
ther US president in history.
:I presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to
:intervene when corruption was revealed.
:I presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused to use
:the national reserves as past presidents have.
:I cut health care benefits for war veterans.
:I set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take
:to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for
rotest against any person in the history of mankind.
:I dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.
:I've made my presidency the most secretive and unaccountable of any in US
:history.
:Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history.
The poorest multimillionaire, Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker
:named after her).
:I am the first president in US history to have all 50 states of the Union
:simultaneously go bankrupt.
:I presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud in any market in
:any country in the history of the world.
:I am the first president in US history to order a US attack and military
ccupation of a sovereign nation, and I did so against the will of the
:United Nations and the world community.
:I have created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history
f the United States.
:I set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more
:than any other president in US history.
:I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations remove the
:US from the Human Rights Commission.
:I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations remove the
:US from the Elections Monitoring Board.
:I removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of
:congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history.
:I rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
:I withdrew from the World Court of Law.
:I refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by default
:no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
:I am the first president in US history to refuse United Nations election
:inspectors access during the 2002 US elections.
:I am the all-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign
:donations.
:The biggest lifetime contributor to my campaign, who is also one of my best
:friends, presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in
:world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).
:I spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US
:history.
:I am the first president to run and hide when the US came under attack (and
:then lied, saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
:I am the first US president to establish a secret shadow government.
:I took the world's sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a year
:made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest
:diplomatic failure in US and world history).
:I am the first US president in history to have a majority of the people of
:Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and
:stability.
:I am the first US president in history to have the people of South Korea
:more threatened by the US than by their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
:I changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government
:contracts.
:I set the all time record for the number of administration employees who
:violated US law by not selling their huge investments in corporations
:bidding for government contracts.
:I have removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any
ther president in US history. In a little over two years I have created the
:most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided that the US has
:been since the civil war.
:I entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than
:two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.
:
:
:RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
:
:I have at least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving
:record has been erased and is not available).
:I was AWOL from the National Guard and deserted the military during time of
:war. I refuse to take a drug test or even answer any questions about drug
:use.
:All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to my
:father's library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public.
:All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or bankrupt
:companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
:All minutes of meetings of any public corporation for which I served on the
:board are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
:Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding public
:energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.
:
ERSONAL REFERENCES:
:
:For personal references, please speak to my dad or uncle James Baker. (They
:can be reached in their offices at the Carlyle Group where they are helping
:to divide up the spoils of the US-Iraq war and plan for the next one).