Kill a dream

Granted. She is also 90 years old.

I wish that Monday was a long way away
 
Granted, but Monday is also the day when you no longer have to be an electric mouse.

I wish I could travel around the world on an epic quest about something.

(and no, I do not consider travelling around the world fighting Pokemon a corruption of the above dream, so no pikachu references)
 
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Granted. You are on a quest to find the largest poo in existence. Good luck with that.

I wish that today was a holiday.
 
Granted. You are on a quest to find the largest poo in existence. Good luck with that.

Spoilered for grossness:

poop.jpg

http://www.isavo.com/biggest-poop.htm
(Yes, I actually searched for the biggest poop in the world.)

Anyways, granted. It's Australian Urinate In Public day.

I wish I had gotten this done sooner.
 
Granted. Several years ago. And now it's out of date and overdue.

I wish it was above 0oC outside.
 
Granted. It's 30oC, and you're completely innapropriately dressed, in winter clothes.

I wish my chest would stop itching.
 
Granted. It is now burning. As the million fire ants start eating you alive. As there is nothing you can do as you have been pegged out over an ants nest.

I wish that there were more hours
 
Granted. And as work is wont to do, it expands to fill the extra hours. No, that doesn't mean you get a payrise.

I wish I knew the lottery numbers.
 
Granted, but you lose the ticket and a homeless drunk guy picks it up, he collects your winnings and promptly begins drinking himself to death.

I wish the house move would go quicker.
 
Granted. It is big. Like really big. Like 30 storeys big. And it's foot is rapidly descending onto your head and you have no where to run.

I wish that the pay lasted longer than the fortnight.
 
Granted it lasts 15 days now instead of 14.

I wish I was in my new house already.
 
Granted. But the roof leaks, the doors are draughty, the cockroaches are as big as coon cats, and the spider infestation is flame proof.

I wish that I had normal straight hair.
 
Granted, but then you suddenly go bald.

I wish I could change, my weight, height and age etc at will.
 
Granted. But the ability gets passed to me instead. :tease:

I wish that I had the strength of my convictions.
 
Granted. You are now as strong as a convicted strangler. (What? Different type of convictions? Oops... :wicked:)

I wish I could grant everyone's wishes f' real.
 
Granted. Just for the hell of it :D

I wish that it was this afternoon already.
 
Granted. Well... actually it was alread afternoon. Several times, since you posted that. Are we not generous?

I wish I didn't like chocolate so much.

Sorry. No. I mean I wish I wasn't so bad at telling lies :p
 
Granted. You're now very good at telling lies. Now no one believes what you say.

I wish it was a bit warmer
 
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