EsPpY
Well-Known Member
Courtesy of PlanetF1... pretty funny so I'd thought I'd share..
F1 Drivers
Be nice on the radio in 2009. From now on, everyone will be able to hear you. Let's not have any more Juan-Pablo moments broadcast on the world TV feed; as in "F***ing Raikkonen!" (Though the plan to make all radio traffic available might go the same way as the televised driver briefings we were going to have...and never got).
Jenson Button
Find some interesting new hobbies just in case that mythical Honda buyer never shows up. As you've got a beard all you need to go trainspotting now is a notepad and an anorak.
Lewis Hamilton
Don't say things like: "Nobody overtakes me round the outside!" because when it happens at the very first corner of the very next race, you look a bit of an arse.
Luiz Antonio Massa
Wait for the result before you start to celebrate.
Robert Kubica
Lose some weight, chubby, that single chocolate you had at Christmas has really tipped the scales.
Felipe Massa
Green doesn't necessarily mean Go under the Ferrari pit light system. (Though we suspect you've figured this out).
Flavio Briatore
Ferrari passed their good engines on to Toro Rosso, Flav, so do the same with Renault engines for Red Bull. It's the least you could do as you nicked their engine cover.
Mark Webber
Watch out for the 4x4...
Luca Montezemolo
If it comes down to a Ferrari vs McLaren scrap in the last race of 2009, mount the TV on the wall at a minimum height of 1.3 metres, so you can't easily get your foot up to it. Oh, and try not to present Bernie Ecclestone with the opportunity for Sports Quote of 2008 by comparing the Singapore GP to a circus. (Bernie's riposte was that if Singapore was a circus, we have to be greatful to Ferrari for providing the clowns.)
Bernie Ecclestone
Get your wad out Bernard Charles, 2009 is going to be expensive. Slavicia wants the yacht and the house and FOTA want the shop.
Max Mosley
Don't go down to the cellar, Max. Or should that be 'in' the cellar...
Michael Schumacher
Look, if Lance Armstrong can come out of retirement to ride the Tour de France...
Nelson Piquet Junior
Try a bit harder in 2009. But not too hard that Fernando gets worried. By the way, the hair's still looking lovely, the L'Oreal contract can't be far off now.
David Coulthard
Good luck on your new career as BBC's F1 pundit. Now, you might as well get it over with and call the BBC's football/NFL/ F1 presenter Jake Humphry a vacuous, talentless, gawky tw*t in the first programme. You're going to be thinking it all spring and all summer so you might as well get it out of your system.
And, I didnt know this but, in 2009 all radio traffic can be heard by everyone ?!
F1 Drivers
Be nice on the radio in 2009. From now on, everyone will be able to hear you. Let's not have any more Juan-Pablo moments broadcast on the world TV feed; as in "F***ing Raikkonen!" (Though the plan to make all radio traffic available might go the same way as the televised driver briefings we were going to have...and never got).
Jenson Button
Find some interesting new hobbies just in case that mythical Honda buyer never shows up. As you've got a beard all you need to go trainspotting now is a notepad and an anorak.
Lewis Hamilton
Don't say things like: "Nobody overtakes me round the outside!" because when it happens at the very first corner of the very next race, you look a bit of an arse.
Luiz Antonio Massa
Wait for the result before you start to celebrate.
Robert Kubica
Lose some weight, chubby, that single chocolate you had at Christmas has really tipped the scales.
Felipe Massa
Green doesn't necessarily mean Go under the Ferrari pit light system. (Though we suspect you've figured this out).
Flavio Briatore
Ferrari passed their good engines on to Toro Rosso, Flav, so do the same with Renault engines for Red Bull. It's the least you could do as you nicked their engine cover.
Mark Webber
Watch out for the 4x4...
Luca Montezemolo
If it comes down to a Ferrari vs McLaren scrap in the last race of 2009, mount the TV on the wall at a minimum height of 1.3 metres, so you can't easily get your foot up to it. Oh, and try not to present Bernie Ecclestone with the opportunity for Sports Quote of 2008 by comparing the Singapore GP to a circus. (Bernie's riposte was that if Singapore was a circus, we have to be greatful to Ferrari for providing the clowns.)
Bernie Ecclestone
Get your wad out Bernard Charles, 2009 is going to be expensive. Slavicia wants the yacht and the house and FOTA want the shop.
Max Mosley
Don't go down to the cellar, Max. Or should that be 'in' the cellar...
Michael Schumacher
Look, if Lance Armstrong can come out of retirement to ride the Tour de France...
Nelson Piquet Junior
Try a bit harder in 2009. But not too hard that Fernando gets worried. By the way, the hair's still looking lovely, the L'Oreal contract can't be far off now.
David Coulthard
Good luck on your new career as BBC's F1 pundit. Now, you might as well get it over with and call the BBC's football/NFL/ F1 presenter Jake Humphry a vacuous, talentless, gawky tw*t in the first programme. You're going to be thinking it all spring and all summer so you might as well get it out of your system.
And, I didnt know this but, in 2009 all radio traffic can be heard by everyone ?!