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Should disabled people have children?

Should disabled people have children?

  • Yes, of course, you can't deny them to have children

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • I don't know, let the politician decide, they know better.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    1

Jostyrostelli

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Joined
May 29, 2004
Messages
8,061
I don't think we've discussed something like this before, other than maybe a few posts.

I want to introduce this to see what you all think about this.

We're talking about mentally disabled parents here, and the question if they should be allowed to raise children. First of all, with this first post I'm trying to convince someone.

We had a few debates on tv and in the politics about this, lots of different opinions. 2/3 of the children are being taken away from their parents.

Do you choose for: Yes, a mentally disabled person can have and raise children.

Problems with this is that if you have parents with less IQ, a child will be 'smarter' than his parents at about 6 or 7 years old, depends. Can a child handle that? There are known cases where that was a big problem for the child, and the child had been taken away from the parents.
If you say, everybody has rights, so mentally disabled people have the right to have children too. But does the child have a decent future then?

Or do you say: every person has rights, and also has the right to have children.
Of course, they have the desire of having children too. That they are mentally disabled wouldn't have to mean that they are bad parents. Their priorities may lie a little then from other people, but they can be just as loving as other parents.

I once saw a documentary about it, and many of the parents just lost interest in the children, the children were underfed and not clean and healthy. They depended on healthcare afterwarths and eventually the children had to be taken away from them. 9 months later they already had a new baby. They took that away too, and still they persisted and 9months later another child was born. Question raised if they should use castration or "the pill" in the form of food or somethin else like a shot.

There are no criteria for good parenting, there are however some essential things (mentally disabled) parents need to have.
Be able to call for help, and accept it.
Being able to create a affective bound with your children.

I could write more, but you all have different opinions so let's start.

Btw, my opinion:
It's a tough subject, but I think the child is more important.
The life of a child can be fucked up badly if parents don't do a good job.
And I think if you have happy parents but a desperate child, it's not good.
Better have no children then, I know these people have rights too, but you have to have priorities. There is no justification to have a child for your own pleasure. It proves that 2/3 of the mentally disabled parents can't parent, so should you accept that and let the child suffer?
Of course I have no problem with the people who CAN parent, no problem at all. But I doubt it still if the kids will have a good life, I saw in that same documentary that a 30 year old woman, a child of mentally disabled parents (mom and dad) and now she has to visit them daily and take care of their stuff, finance and laundy. She has to tell them things, they are not even interested in her. This is just an example.

So shout people.
 
Your post is way too long so I won't read it.

My opinion on this matter:
No one can decide what should be done. If these people want children, why not? If you look at it from the parent's point of view, you should say yes, it could help them finding the meaning to their lives.
But if you look at it from the child's pov, you might say no. Because can this child ever find the meaning of its life? It could have a very good life, be very happy.
No one can say this, and no one has the right to deny anyone life.
 
I think if a someone isn't capable of meeting the basic physical needs (food, shelter) of a child they shouldn't be a parent.

I think the difficult question is where do you draw the line between a capable and incapable?
 
It all depends on the mental status of the parents. There are so many nuances in mental ilnesses. Same cases might work out while others never would. You can always rule out the overcharged parent's, that shouldn't be a problem. However in some cases it might not be entirely certain if the parents could or could not handle a child. I'd say it's not the primary buisiness of the state to raise it's children. In such cases the authorizies should help and supervise the parents. If to stands out that the children or the parents can't handle the situation thee's always time to act. Acting overhasty (ie. taking away the children immediatly whenever signs of a mental illness occur) does more harm than good. I believe that you take the childrens chance of a perfectly normal life away too soon if deny the parents rights.

You have to keep in mind that the alternative (children's home) is no perfectly normal
environment either. It will cause damage to child development likewise.
 
@Swek: that's what I was trying to say, can you deny the parents to have children (if they haven't had children before) to prevent the child to have to go to children's homes, or do you take the chance?
 
Disabled parents should not only think about their own selfish wish to have children, but also think about the children themselves.

Diabled or not, they should know that having children is very risky to them and the fetus. If you are not fit to have children, you should not. It's not limited to just mentally disabled people. It goes for couples with insufficient income to support children. It also goes for couples who has a history of violence and crime.

Having a child is just an "accident" or even a joke for most people. They should think beyond their own self-centered view about the decision. After all, they would be bringing in a brand new life to the world. They are responsible for providing the proper environment in which that child will thrive. Governments and other people in society should not be responsible for your little "mistake."
 
I'm seldomly bringing in God into debates but now i do. If God made u able to have chlidren, u should, if u want to and feel u can handle the responisbility which a child brings. If it proves u can not handle the responsebility (if u have made the choise to have children) social services should step in imo.

If you take the religious opinions out of the eqvation you could still see it in the way that people are born with natural abilities with one of them being to be able to have children, no one should be denied that priveledge. It is important to remember that u are not automatically a bad parent because u are disbleled in any way although chances of it might be higher.
 
I don't really think mentally disabled parents should be allowed to have children. No matter how much they love their children, love isn't going to give the children everything they need.

One thing I think children need is a parent capable of supporting them mentally as well as physically.
 
Vette_boss said:
I don't really think mentally disabled parents should be allowed to have children. No matter how much they love their children, love isn't going to give the children everything they need.

One thing I think children need is a parent capable of supporting them mentally as well as physically.

thats is very true... *quote from movie "I am sam" *quote*

if the parents mental ability is only 8 years old, how can one expect him to father a kid who is mentally going to be older than him in a couple of years... and as swek said, this also depends on the condition of the parents... but sadly, in most cases... the case is they are uncapable of being a parent :(
 
You can't tell them not to have kids... it's just.. no.

And it's not the end of the world if their children gets taken away, it's still their children and that's done for their education.
 
Roland: So what if two mentally disabled people decide to have a 4th kid, the other 3 were already been taken away and they are clearly not good parents...?

As I said in my first post, I'm talking about the 2/3 of the people who can't raise their children, 1/3 has 'less problems' which is acceptable.
 
Roland said:
I'm seldomly bringing in God into debates but now i do. If God made u able to have chlidren, u should, if u want to and feel u can handle the responisbility which a child brings. If it proves u can not handle the responsebility (if u have made the choise to have children) social services should step in imo.

If you take the religious opinions out of the eqvation you could still see it in the way that people are born with natural abilities with one of them being to be able to have children, no one should be denied that priveledge. It is important to remember that u are not automatically a bad parent because u are disbleled in any way although chances of it might be higher.

I do not see why the other citizens in their country have to pay for their child because they are unable to. How ill-considerate do you have to be to say that you want a child but if things don't work out I'll let the government do it for me?

God also gave Hitler the ability to lead a country into believing to hate and exterminate Jews. Are you saying that Hitler was right to do that also?

God give us the ability to do almost anything, but it's up to our own judgement to make this world good for all of us. This is why we condone violence among other things even though we find it entertaining.
 
So what does that tell us !!!

YUP, Josty u cant have kids !! :lol: Is that person convinced yet :lol:


Sorry couldnt help it! :lol:
 
interesting topic josty. i've never really thought about it before, my opinion is that, by and largely, it's not in the kids' best interest to have mentally handicapped parents. but how could you word a law so that it wasn't prejudiced?

furthermore, i'm sure there's a lot more fully abled parents who are bad parents in the world than handicapped parents. so would you extend the law to include them? if you didn't, then it'd be a prejudiced law that would be overturned by the justice system (maybe not in america ;) ) if you did, then you're talking about a reproductive licence, which is touching on some very serious freedom-stripping shit.

i'd be interested to hear other people's opinions. again, interesting topic josty.
 
To deny someone their right to have children and be parents is disgusting and just plain wrong.

Did you know that in the state of Virginia, people who were determined to be "afflicted with a hereditary form of insanity or imbecility" were sterilized according to state law? Granted, this was in the 1920s, but that just goes to show you how far we've come since then. This is a dark spot in Virginia's history and is just plain disturbing. This basically means the state could decide you're dumb and should be sterilized...horrifying, no?
 
In a world where millions of children have no home, it's inherently selfish for anyone to have a child. Another being to consume scarce resources. I think more people should look into adoption as an option, or are we so great that our child must be made in our likeness?
 
Because there are kids already born that need homes, why go out and have your own. I think it can be considered a selfish desire. I'm not saying people shouldn't have kids, and I would like to have my own kids one day as well. But it does seem selfish.
 
I can't disagree more. Well I suppose I probably could. The world's children aren't our problem or responsibility, and if poor, stupid, destitute, crack addicted people keep having children making them even more poor, well that's thier fault. If anything known addicts should be sterilized, at least temporarily.

It doesn't exactly help when large portions of certain faiths and political parties are dead set against birth control.

All that said i would like to one day adopt a little chinese girl.
 
People are selfish, we let animals suffer so we can eat nice, we want fur to keep us warm and don't care about the animals. We want a new car, and don't give that money away to Africa, we want the best for ourselfs and don't care about the rest.

But there are some exeptions, people who volunteer for Unicef or Greenpeace and actually help people.

Anyway, back on topic.

Adoption on a big scale will never happen, people (me included) want our own kids, that look like us.
 
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