Stig Introduction Competition

some say he chokes on carrots, and that he has four nostrils, all we know is, he's called the stig!
 
Some say his brain consists of a turbo intercooler, others say his real name is John and that he lives in the countryside with his wife and two children. All we know is he's called The Stig...
 
Some say he was born with his racing outfit on, and that jet fuel runs through his veins. All we know is...
 
Some say his teeth are silicon carbide, and his intestines are stainless steel. All we know...

Some say his heart is a Wankel and his pupils are vertical. All we know...

Some say he knows how to open the door of a TVR, and he can?t drive in a straight line. All we know...
 
Some say he walks like a penguin, and he once roundhouse-kicked Chuck Norris to the ground. All we know is he's called the Stig

ok that was lame :oops:
 
Some say he has black blood, and that he is scared of bald men. All we know is that he is called the stig. :cheers:
 
Some say that that he's had his teeth whitened, like Richard Hammond and that he is allergic to snow. All we know is that he's called the stig
 
Some say that if he stuck his fingers in a power outlet, the world?s energy problems would be solved and he knows the location of the Triforce. (you know the rest)
 
Some say if you can see The Stig, then he can see you....
 
Some say the he is in fact the cause of global warming, others say that if someone complained about him then he go round and shove the complainer's phone right up their ridiculously retentive arses...
 
Some Say that he created the Piccadilly Line underground using just his teeth, and that he once ate a giraffe with chips and peas! *looks left and right* All we know is...he's called The Stig!
 
Some say his body is a carbon fiber shell with no excess weight to slow him down all we know is...
 
Some say he asks for cheese on everything, others say he takes himself too seriously, all we know he's called the Stigs's Fat Cousin.

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Some say that he beat the Starship Enterprise in a straight-line drag race, and that he choreographed Michel Jackson's Thriller video.. All we know...
 
Some say he's Michael Schumacher *wink wink*, others say he's Ayrton Senna's ghost. But all we know is...
 
Some say that a small strand of his DNA is can be found behind the instrument panel of every Koenigsegg CCX, others say he passes solids that taste like chicken. All we know is ...
 
Some say he was born in Finland and that he is the evil twin of Kimi R?ikk?nen, All we know is..... (talks more than kimi)
 
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