Stig Introduction Competition

Some say he was born in Hiroshima in August, 1945 and that in his spare time he plays 'Gran Turismo' in his brain. All we know is his called The Stig!
 
Some say that he once challenged Tony Blair for the role of Prime Minister, and merely by sneezing he has the power to start tornados, all we know is...
 
Some say he was once smoked cannabis with David Cameron and feverently denied it, and that he can change a ship's course merely by smiling. All we know is...
 
And heres one for his fat cousin.

Some say he got into a Hummer and it broke in half and others say cars bounce off him when they crash into him. All we know is he's called Fat Stig!

Some say he can belly-flop a juggernaut to the middle of Russia and that he can have a heart attack without knowing. All we know is he's called Fat Stig!
 
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Normal stig intro...

Some say he killed Alexander Litvinenko and that he can take off into space by farting. All was know is, he's called the Stig!
 
Some say that he lives among plastic bags, and that once he stared down a washing machine. All we know is, He's call the Stig!
 
Some say that he is the only person to survive a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick and that he is Goofy's biological father. All we know is, he's called the Stig!
 
Some say his mother was a cheetah and his tail was surgically removed... all we know is that he's called The Stig.

Some say that he's the basis for Exxon's tiger mascot, and his purr matches that of a DB9... all we know is, he's called the Stig.

Some say that he wears gloves to keep his claws in, and that his growl makes F1 drivers cower... all we know is, he's called the Stig.
 
Some say his suit is his outer skin, and that he sheds it every fortnight, all we know is, he's called the Stig
 
Here's some more...

Some say, The Stig can win a game of monopoly without owning any property.

Some say, The Stig has counted to infinity......Twice!

Some say, The Stig once ordered a Big Mac from Burger King....And got one

:stig: :stig: :stig: :stig: :stig:
 
Some say he tried racing James Dean's Porsche in a Ford Tudor, but drove the wrong way....all we know....
 
Some say he spends all week sending complaints into the BBC, and that his nasal passages are lined with titanium...
 
Some say that he was born before his mother, and that his brain is fuel-injected.

Some say that he short-circuits speed cameras, and that his heart has 16 valves.

Some say he is exempt from the Geneva Convention, and that he drove both cars in the Bullitt chase.

All we know is, he's called the Stig.
 
Some say that he hates these introductions, and he plans to go on strike...all we know...
 
Some say that he's a balding, middle aged man, who'd prefer to be called The Gimp....
 
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