Stupid Driver Stories

the Interceptor

I LUV MY PRIUS!!!
Joined
Feb 22, 2005
Messages
6,041
Location
ze Vaterland
Car(s)
VW Diesel of Death
Okay, here's another one of mine. I was going home from visiting my uncle together with my parents. I was driving the car though. Close to home, there's a fairly broad road with a speed limit of 70 km/h (44 mph). Just before you get to the crossing where I have to turn right, you go over a bridge. Obviously, this is a blind crest, probably with cars queueing up at the crossing, therefor I think that doing 80 km/h (50 mph) there is enough. The guy behind me didn't think so it seemed, cause he was approaching fast and tailgated me badly. I was in my parents Ford Scorpio by the way, he was in some kind of Nissan Offroader.

Unfortunately for him, we were both going right at the crossing. After you've turned, there's a short acceleration lane, from which you can go on two lanes. The left one goes left only after 300 metres, the right one goes straight. I figured that he'd want to go straight, cause only the people that live there (like us) go left. So, I set my indicator and crossed the middle one to the left lane. The tailgater however didn't want to wait until I am out of his way, he immediately pulled to the very left to overtake me.

So, I honked my horn, because I already was about half on the lane he suddenly appeared on. But I had to give way. After he had passed me, he slammed on his brakes to annoy me. I had to brake pretty hard as well, so I honked again. He changed to the right lane, opened his side window and shouted some pretty bad words at me. Usually I'm a relaxed, calm guy, but it seems I already was on adrenaline. I opened the passengers side window and shouted back. He stopped the car and got out, and so did I. About 0.2 seconds later, we were standing face to face ... in theory. I'm 6'3", rather fat than muscular, but pretty big. I had to suppress a laugh when I saw that a foreign-looking 5'-guy had climbed out of that pretty big Nissan. He asked me if I was stupid, and what my problem would be. I told him that he shouldn't tailgate me, and that he could have been going as fast as he wanted if he'd have been waiting another 3 seconds for me to get out of his way. We were arguing about a minute, then he just stopped, went back to his car and drove off with screeching tyres.

Only now, I noticed that a fair amount of cars, about 20 maybe, had gathered behind us. Funnily, noone ever honked to flashed his lights, they were just standing there, probably waiting for us to hit each other or something. It must have been a pretty funny sight, finding two cars parking on a two-lane-road, and the drivers standing face to face shouting at each other. Anyway, I got back in the car and drove the rest of the way home. My parents looked pretty scared, my mom just said:"I've never seen you like that!".

Regards
the Interceptor
 
Last edited:

IceBone

Blue Wheel Hipster
Joined
Jan 14, 2007
Messages
27,206
Location
Slovenistan
Car(s)
Audi A5 Quattro
The bigger the car, the smaller the body (part). That's why i want the baby aston ;)
 

Eye-Q

Forum Addict
Joined
Feb 17, 2007
Messages
5,623
Location
Hamburg, Autobahnland
Car(s)
None anymore...
one more thing, and this one isn't nessasarily "stupid" but i notice around here that everybody is willing to drive as much as 20mph over the limit as long as you do it in front of them
Could be a psychological thing - "If the driver in front of me isn't flashed by a speed camera I won't get flashed, too" (or the otherway round "If the driver in front of me is flashed I'm able to brake so I won't get flashed")...
 

the Interceptor

I LUV MY PRIUS!!!
Joined
Feb 22, 2005
Messages
6,041
Location
ze Vaterland
Car(s)
VW Diesel of Death
I've got another (shorter) one. It happened some years ago, during my apprenticeship. I didn't have a license at the time, so I went there by tram. It was a sunny, nice day, and I was on my way from work to the station. For that, I needed to cross a huge crossing with three lanes in each direction. I arrived at the traffic light, which was red. I had to wait for probably twenty seconds for it to turn green for me. At the same time, cars were approaching from the sides, which obviously had to stop. I don't know why, but as I stepped on the road, I took a look to the left. On the right and left lane, cars were already waiting, but there was noone on the middle lane ... until a huge truck, seemingly not impressed by the red light he had, just blew over the crossing at full speed (maybe 60 km/h = 38 mph). I just stopped walking, and he missed me by maybe 3 feet (which is not too much, considering the draft a truck generates at that speed).

I immediately noticed that if I hadn't looked, I wouldn't have seen him coming. Do you know the bus/girl scene from "Final Destination"? It would have looked like that, and I'm absolutely sure I'd be dead. I remember I even saw the driver. He wasn't looking at the traffic, he was looking down, probably reading a map or something.

Thanks to my guardian angel btw :bow:
 
Last edited:

Punisher Bass

He who drives a Buick
Joined
Feb 25, 2007
Messages
3,406
Location
St Louis, MO
Car(s)
98 Buick Park Avenue Ultra
About 0.2 seconds later, we were standing face to face ... in theory. I'm 6'3", rather fat than muscular, but pretty big. I had to suppress a laugh when I saw that a foreign-looking 5'-guy had climbed out of that pretty big Nissan.

I've found that most of the time short guys always act like they have something to prove, especially to people who are tall. They want to play David & Goliath every day. Since most of the time they can't really kick someones ass, they figure driving a really big/fast/expensive car makes up for it. There have been a few times in my adult life where someone wanted to start something with me and then realized it was a bad idea.

About 3 or 4 years ago I was outside in my driveway at night changing a tire. This guy comes ripping down my street and turns at our driveway (we live on a corner). He stops and for some unknown reason yells at me "FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!" and takes off. I was too stunned to react with anything other than confusion.

About a minute later here he comes again. He stops the car, gives me another "FUCK YOU!!!!!", only this time he doesn't take off. Pissed off at this point I stand up, I'm 6'6 and weigh around 300 pounds, with the tire iron in my hand and start walking to the car. About a second later he took off as fast as his car could go. I don't know why, I just wanted to ask him why he felt the need to shout at me, telling me to go fuck myself in a normal voice would have gotten the point across.

If I had a bad temper (or if it had crossed my mind at the time) I would have chucked the tire iron at his rear window while he was pulling away.

While on the subject, here is Eddie Murphy's take (partly) on little guys vs big guys.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fp67geuhJM
 

the Interceptor

I LUV MY PRIUS!!!
Joined
Feb 22, 2005
Messages
6,041
Location
ze Vaterland
Car(s)
VW Diesel of Death
About 3 or 4 years ago I was outside in my driveway at night changing a tire. This guy comes ripping down my street and turns at our driveway (we live on a corner). He stops and for some unknown reason yells at me "FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!" and takes off. I was too stunned to react with anything other than confusion.

About a minute later here he comes again. He stops the car, gives me another "FUCK YOU!!!!!", only this time he doesn't take off. Pissed off at this point I stand up, I'm 6'6 and weigh around 300 pounds, with the tire iron in my hand and start walking to the car. About a second later he took off as fast as his car could go. I don't know why, I just wanted to ask him why he felt the need to shout at me, telling me to go fuck myself in a normal voice would have gotten the point across.

If I had a bad temper (or if it had crossed my mind at the time) I would have chucked the tire iron at his rear window while he was pulling away.
Uh oh I remember a nice one that happened in a similar way. Sorry guys, this is not about driving, but it fits so well. My dad was making a new fence at home, out of wire netting and steel tubes of maybe 2,50 metres (about 8'). He was concreting in the tubes behind the house at this particular day, when a lady rang at the front door. My mom opened, and the lady said that she sells dish clothes, and asked my mom if she needs some. She said no, and the lady was pissed. She sat down on the step in front of the front door and said that she won't leave before my mom bought any of her stuff (interesting strategy btw). My mom went to my dad and told him, and he was just taking the next steel tube to a hole. He wanted to take a look and went around the house to the front door, with the steel tube still on his shoulder. Man, did the lady run when she saw him. :lol:
 

thedguy

rides with Rebecca Black.. in the back
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
9,006
Location
Orange California
Car(s)
(OO=[][]=OO)
ottobon said:
Anyways the worst thing that has happened to me is i passed a maroon caddilac STS and the driver (lady i think) thought that for some reason i was the spawn of satan and that she had to hunt me down, i thought she may be chasing me as she started driving rather aggressive behind me, so i took a illogical route around, and sure enough she was chasing me, atleast until i got to a road that i know to be very open and very safe which i proceeded to go way to fast on, the thing is though im usually pro-speed (as long as everybody pays attention that is) but i don't like being forced to run-away from people, i would have driven home much much slower if she wouldn't have chased me, and i resent the fact that i was somewhat bullied into speeding (being that i'm none-confrontational)

She wanted your manhood, should have gotten her number
naughtysb8.gif


one more thing, and this one isn't nessasarily "stupid" but i notice around here that everybody is willing to drive as much as 20mph over the limit as long as you do it in front of them, I can think of many people who are toodaling along at 45mph in a 55, and then proceed to drive 65-70 as long as i do so in front of them

Thats an easy one. They figure the guy up front is going to get busted by the police. Or will pad them from the impending wreck. As more cars start to go faster, others assume it's safe. This is especially true when the truckers are doing 75+, cause we know they know where the cops are.
 
Last edited:

No Boss

Neener, neener, I banned your title!
Joined
Oct 8, 2005
Messages
6,889
Location
Wherever the Coast Guard sends me.
Car(s)
'07 Volvo XC70 Polestar, '01 Miata SE
I was driving home from school one day and there was a lady really riding close to the ass of my car. So initially I thought nothing of it, but it wasn't until she stayed there and didn't pass after 20 to 30 seconds. So I started to slow down, I was doing 70, and slowed down to about 55. She merged over to the left lane (I thought to pass me), but just stayed there. Not accelerating, not slowing down. So that was the last straw and it just annoyed me. After sitting there, in my blind spot, for what seemed like a full minute of highway driving, she started to speed up. I sped up to just to be a complete dick to her. Here's where it gets weird:

As she began to pass me, I matched her speed, and as soon as we hit 70mph on the dot... BAM she slams on her brakes and lays on her horn. Then she slides right in behind me as close to my bumper as she could. At this point we were in the middle lane of a three lane highway, on a straight piece of road, with no other traffic. So I literally turned round in my seat, raised my hands in the :dunno: position and laughed at her (I held the wheel steady with my knee so I didn't veer off and die). She stayed that close to my bumper for the rest of the ride on the highway (only about 1/2 a mile).

As I turn my inidcator on to merge off the highway, she veered towards me. About a year ago a mate of mine broke off the arm that held my rear wiper on the hatch of my car. Instead of replacing it we put a windscreen washer nozzle in the hole the arm came out of and positioned it precisely. Now anytime someone rides my ass, or annoys me, I just shoot them with a nice 15ft long stream of washer fluid.

Let's just say as I got off the highway this lady got her windscreen cleaned for free.

/If I knew how to upload videos from my computer to the interwebs, I'd post one of the spray in action.
 
Last edited:

the Interceptor

I LUV MY PRIUS!!!
Joined
Feb 22, 2005
Messages
6,041
Location
ze Vaterland
Car(s)
VW Diesel of Death
About a year ago a mate of mine broke off the arm that held my rear wiper on the hatch of my car. Instead of replacing it we put a windscreen washer nozzle in the hole the arm came out of and positioned it precisely. Now anytime someone rides my ass, or annoys me, I just shoot them with a nice 15ft long stream of washer fluid.

Let's just say as I got off the highway this lady got her windscreen cleaned for free.
Someone did that very thing to me once. The exit I usually take of the Autobahn when I come home from work can easily be taken with 50 km/h (I did 80 km/h once, and the tyres didn't even make any noises). The guy I was following did 30 km/h, and I couldn't even brake as hard (coming from 120 km/h) not to tailgate him. Right in the curve, he "washed my windscreen". I was shocked and almost threw my car in the ditch ... I wouldn't exactly classify this as funny, would you? :no:
 

No Boss

Neener, neener, I banned your title!
Joined
Oct 8, 2005
Messages
6,889
Location
Wherever the Coast Guard sends me.
Car(s)
'07 Volvo XC70 Polestar, '01 Miata SE
Someone did that very thing to me once. The exit I usually take of the Autobahn when I come home from work can easily be taken with 50 km/h (I did 80 km/h once, and the tyres didn't even make any noises). The guy I was following did 30 km/h, and I couldn't even brake as hard (coming from 120 km/h) not to tailgate him. Right in the curve, he "washed my windscreen". I was shocked and almost threw my car in the ditch ... I wouldn't exactly classify this as funny, would you? :no:

Well no, It's not.

But neither is tailgating, riding in a blindspot, not using your indicator, giving the finger, the black death, republicans, The Half-Hour News Hour, Lexuses, or injured puppies.

See what I mean.
 

Brother Michael

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 29, 2007
Messages
2,039
Location
Inkoo, Finland
Car(s)
-02 BMW 530d Touring M-Sport
Well no, It's not.

But neither is tailgating, riding in a blindspot, not using your indicator, giving the finger, the black death, republicans, The Half-Hour News Hour, Lexuses, or injured puppies.

See what I mean.


It is Lexi you ignorant fool, not Lexuses !!! I am so sorry, but I couldn't resist the temptation :mrgreen:
 

NAIDANAC A

Well-Known Member
Joined
May 30, 2006
Messages
4,440
Location
Ontario, Canada
Car(s)
300E
Today I had one of those situations when a person sees a yellow but is too much of a dumb ass/retard to stop and then the person turning left has to wait...O and my mother was driving and she was the one speeding up. I turn to her...throw my hands in the air and say "wth...you seriously cannot drive"
Needless to say she is angry with me.
 

the Interceptor

I LUV MY PRIUS!!!
Joined
Feb 22, 2005
Messages
6,041
Location
ze Vaterland
Car(s)
VW Diesel of Death
Well no, It's not.

But neither is tailgating, riding in a blindspot, not using your indicator, giving the finger, ...

See what I mean.
I get your point, but you should be aware that this washer thing can become very dangerous very quickly.
 

KaJuN

Disco Inferno
Joined
Jul 31, 2006
Messages
9,743
Location
Dayton, Ohio
Car(s)
Mini Cooper S, Landy Series III, Vulcan 900 Custom
In this case I think the lady deserved it for going out of her way to be such an ass.

I'm usually pretty patient with idiot drivers. But when they start endangering my safety I can get kinda nasty. I'd rather temporarily blind them with washer fluid than have them slam into the back of me.
 

lip

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 2, 2005
Messages
2,966
Location
Switzerland
Car(s)
Audi S6 Barkwagon
Old thread, but appropriate thread. So here we go:

Recorded by myself: Tailgating BMW on the Autobahn.
http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=JP165mRRRVs

Note the VW Golf infront of him putting his hazards on for a moment.
Flow of traffic on the fast lane was around 140km/h.

Greetings, lip
 

Polygon

Well-Known Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
Messages
841
Location
Utah, United States
Car(s)
LeBaron GTC, Stealth R/T TT, N-SRT-4
I have a ton of stories as drivers in Utah are a huge combination of rude and or retarded.

Just yesterday, some moron in a Passat nearly killed my leaving a Wendys. I was going about 50 MPH, the road was clear. I dropped something on the passenger seat. I took my eyes off the road for a second and when I looked up, there he was. I would guess no more than 30 feet in front of me. Had I been in one of the other cars this wouldn't have been a problem. Alas, I was in the Escape. I gave it a little brake and managed to steer around him. I'm amazed I didn't roll it. Looking back I don't know why I didn't just hit him. It's not my car and it would have been his fault.

If I'm going down I'm taking the moron with me.
 

lip

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 2, 2005
Messages
2,966
Location
Switzerland
Car(s)
Audi S6 Barkwagon
Next one, again recorded by myself:

Rubbernecking drivers. I hate them:
http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=PzcpwtMgMds

After the crash site he comes almost to a complete stop, there is no one infront of him anymore. You can even hear me yelling at him...

Greetings, lip
 

BlaRo

Little Nudger
Joined
Aug 18, 2005
Messages
18,177
Location
Brooklyn
Car(s)
Moto Guzzi V7 Special, Saab 900 Turbo
Today I came across a pretty funny example of driver idiocy.

I was walking across the street at a busy intersection that was restricted due to a football game that our school would inevitably lose. A huge black guy was directing traffic when a young kid in an Audi nearly runs into him and just stops, blocking the intersection. The traffic guy goes up to him.

"Get out of the way and keep moving!" he yells, annoyed.
"FUCK YOU!"
"FAGGOT!"

The Audi pulls up past the intersection, then pulls over and stops. The kid opens the door and gets out but doesn't move past his car. The traffic guy at this point is pissed and keeps yelling, "GET BACK IN THE CAR AND KEEP MOVING!" The kid scowls and yells something intelligible.

"ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?" screamed the traffic guy. "YOU'RE BLOCKING TRAFFIC!"

The kid made some furious-looking arm gestures, scowled a bit more, speechless, and finally stormed off in his car, defeated.

Well, it was pretty exciting to us bystanders.
 
Last edited:
Top