Stupid Driver Stories

So she panicked and ran away from an F350... And into the path of something substantially more dangerous. Sounds like a typical woman driver.

Sounds like you made a damned good catch - good job not getting killed and not killing anyone else in the process.
 
Shit, good you and the X are alright.


Apparently it really is too much to ask of some people to be aware of what's going on all around their car, and not just dead ahead of them, while they're driving.
 
Today I was nearly killed. No, that is not hyperbole.

I was on the freeway, to my right is one more lane of travel and an "Exit Only" lane that is about to turn off. Ahead of me in the lane to my left is an old Crown Victoria with the specialty "Realtor" license plate and very saggy rear springs. The Crown Vic suddenly slows down and moves into my lane. I lift off the gas to slow my closing speed, the Vic starts moving into the right lane, presumably to make the exit that she is about to miss. She has her right signal on and is looking over her right shoulder, it is clear that she intends to exit, but she will likely miss this one and have to take the next ramp. I get back on the gas a bit and bring the X back up to speed to pass her. The following happens in about 1.25 seconds:
  • When I am about two feet away she suddenly slams on the brakes and violently swerves halfway into my lane.
  • I jumped on the brakes and felt the ABS start to kick in as I start to downshift from 6th to 4th. It is clear that I am about to rear-end the Vic in an offset collision with my right front corner. The closing speed is currently at about 40 mph, which will likely cause me to spin and roll.
  • I release the brakes to get some weight on the rear wheels an violently swerve to the next lane to the left, which I know is clear. Note that I am doing this with one hand, because I'm still in the process of downshifting.
  • As the X swerves around the Vic, with about three inches to spare, I turn back to the right to bring the X along a parallel course in the center lane and avoid shooting over all the lanes of travel, which would take out multiple cars.
  • As I steer right, I feel the back start to rotate around in the start of a spin, I have completed the downshift and give the X a bit of gas to stabilize the suspension and a half-turn of opposite lock. The result is essentially a sideways drift perfectly into the adjoining lane. The X settles down on the suspension and goes back to acting like a car and less like a rabid dog trying to murder its own tail.
The Crown Vic was oblivious to this entire maneuver, she had no idea what was going on and presumably didn't hear the chorus of honking and the scream of tortured rubber. To her right through all this, in the Exit Only lane was a Ford F-350 crew cab, that possibly had spooked her into the violent swerve that caused this near-collision.

If I didn't have years of experience driving top-heavy vehicles on loose surfaces like dirt and gravel, slippery surfaces like snow and ice, and experienced the behavior of SUVs when they cock a wheel up off the ground, I'm 100% sure that the VDC would have been overwhelmed and the X would have spun and rolled down the freeway.
Impressive skills, congrats!
 
Why do all women automatically assume we mean them when we say "typical woman driver"? The very fact that they're on this board is proof that they care at least a little about cars and driving and are therefore NOT typical women drivers?

"Typical Final Gear not a dude"
 
It is still a bit sexist. Not all women are bad drivers and that is exactly what that statement implies. That is kinda like saying all men are children, or assholes. Just because that is what all the sitcoms want you to believe does not make it true.
 
From the "Everyone Involved Was A Stupid Driver" files courtesy of MSNBC:

Motorcyclist hurls through van window, lands in rear seat
Driver was unaware of new passenger after 'non-injury collision with a twist'

A Southern California motorcyclist rear-ended a minivan and was thrown through a window into the back seat but escaped unscathed, police said.

After the incident on Thursday, the driver of the minivan continued driving and pulled into his own driveway nearby, unaware that he had a new backseat passenger, the Victorville Daily Press reported.

"We're calling this one a non-injury collision with a twist," Karen Hunt, spokeswoman for the Victorville Police Department, told the newspaper. Victorville is a town of 115,000 people on the southwestern edge of the Mojave Desert.

The incident occurred when the motorcyclist failed to stop in time as the minivan slowed to make a turn, the newspaper reported. The motorcycle then crashed into the van, with the rider hurling through the minivan?s rear window and the motorcycle itself skidding beneath the larger vehicle.

The minivan driver then turned into his driveway, less than half a block away, and was preparing to return to the scene when he realized the stunned motorcyclist was in his backseat, the paper reported.

No charges were filed in the case and neither man required medical attention, Hunt told the Daily Press.

"The helmet sustained most of the impact," Hunt told the paper.

The motorcyclist only asked for ice for one of his hands, the paper said.

The rear window of the minivan and the motorcycle both reportedly sustained severe damage.

1. This could have been really, really bad if the motorcyclist hadn't been wearing gear. As it is, it's more funny than anything else.
2. Motorcyclist gets a stupid driver nod because, well, he wound up in the back of the minivan with his bike underneath it.
3. Minivan operator gets a stupid driver nod because he didn't notice that someone had forcibly entered through the rear window and and landed in the rear seating area. He apparently barely noticed that he'd been in an accident and even continued driving.

Both drivers should be penalized, but the minivan operator should have his license suspended or revoked if he's that oblivious. Such a stereotypical obliviot bimbobox driver...

MSNBC link above, original and more detailed story here: http://www.vvdailypress.com/news/motorcyclist-29015-seat-unaware.html
 
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Ha. I don't know what to say so I will post this unrelated video from the other thread.

 
Just had some berk in an Accord pull out in front of me. He was stopped, heading in the opposite direction waiting to make a right turn. Had he gone right away, he would have made it no problem at all. But he waited. And kept waiting. As I was closing in, I saw him inching forwards, so I backed off and covered the brake (and horn) ready for an idiot driving moment. And then, lo and behold, he pulls out right in front of me. All I see is his terrified girlfriends face in the passenger seat as he drives down the side street. I hope she gave him a mouthful.
 
Why do all women automatically assume we mean them when we say "typical woman driver"? The very fact that they're on this board is proof that they care at least a little about cars and driving and are therefore NOT typical women drivers?

"Typical Final Gear not a dude"


I know, I know. :)

And thanks. :)
 
Why do all women automatically assume we mean them when we say "typical woman driver"?
It's somewhat sexist but I have noticed that women tend to take things in a bad way. As an example I was talking to a lady friend of mine (tree hugging environmentalist but at least she has a degree in environmental science so knows what she's talking about) who drives a Prius. So one day we are talking and I say "90% of Prius drivers are morons", her immediate response "Are you saying I'm a moron?" to which I reply "I simply made a statement it was your choice as to which group you wanted to associate yourself with". I have more examples but they involve my fiancee and she has advanced medical training including surgical training and I value my testicles :p
 
One of my dearest friends can tell you if the stupid driver you just witnessed down the road was a man or a woman. It turns out he's right pretty much all the time.

I think the reason is most stupid male drivers fall in the arrogant-asshole-aggressive-careless-I'm king of the road-gofaster class, while most of the stupid female drivers fall in the oblivious-slow but uncertain-waving-unpredictable-scared class.

Clearly these are only general rules. stupidity is the most unpredictable force in the entire universe.
 
I would theorize that most "soccer-mom-mobiles" like mini-vans and SUVs have drivers that fall into your defined "male" category, regardless of sex (see: my previous story). I think it gives the driver that careless attitude of "I'm bigger than you, and if I hit you, my car will be fine, your's will be totalled, and then I'll sue you."
 
One of my dearest friends can tell you if the stupid driver you just witnessed down the road was a man or a woman. It turns out he's right pretty much all the time.

I think the reason is most stupid male drivers fall in the arrogant-asshole-aggressive-careless-I'm king of the road-gofaster class, while most of the stupid female drivers fall in the oblivious-slow but uncertain-waving-unpredictable-scared class.

Clearly these are only general rules. stupidity is the most unpredictable force in the entire universe.
Yeah. Even I fail at slow driving and parking no matter how good my car control at high speeds tends to be.
 
I got two years out of my first car before I joined my mum and friends in the 'typical women driver slow speed carpark incident' when I put the front of my car into a shrub I didn't see was growing out of the fence in a council parking lot. Scratched the front up around the fogs lights pretty badly. Then, a week later I tapped the rear left quarter of the car into a wooden fence at a sports oval and lost a bit of paint. :facepalm:
 
Woo, only carpark accidents I've had are scraping the front bumper on a stupidly high gutter. Touch wood.

The other day my dad smashed the back window on the canopy of his work ute on a tree in the Bunnings carpark. If a canopy is made of fibreglass, why not make the window out of perspex, I wonder.
 
From today:


First one is typical: Left lane becomes the turn-left lane and many drivers are simply unable to slow down and let the traffic pass. Instead they squeeze themselves in, risking a crash. That Mercedes driver would have maybe lost 10 seconds, if he slowed down and waited, until the right side was clear but obviously that is too much of a demand.

Second one: No indicating, no accelerating, head tilted to the right. Yup, you guessed it: Audi driver talking on his mobile phone. I had to beep out my comment.
 
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