The best ever Clarkson,Hammond and May Quotes

[caro]

Thank you.

 

[zoolean]

my favorite from season 15:

(15x04, talking about hair and convertibles)
JC: "...to demonstrate this we need James May, but sadly he's busy today, building a nuclear submarine out of Lego probably, so instead we've got someone who looks JUST like him, except for EVERY SINGLE DETAIL......"

 

[zetruz]

10x04, the Africa special - one of the cars is stuck in the Makgadikgadi cr?me br?l?e salt pan, and Richard is working hard to get it back up...
"We need a hundred men or more."

Always cracks me up...

 

[IceBone]

Silly how few people noticed that. I got it the first second and had to pause the video to go all giddy over it.

 

[Aurelio]

JC:He would be the worst person in the world for that job. (To RH, about presenting Formula 1)
JM:...Well...Not absolutely...

During the news, in the factual road trip episode.

 

[capra]

Argh, I missed it. :/ (The Toto reference , I mean)

 

[Aston Martin]

"I wouldn't want to eat Jeremy"

 

[tezgm99]

my wording might be a little off...I cannot for the life of me find which episode it was in but it was when Jezza was sucking up to Ford so he could get the GT. It was in the news and they were talking about a souped up version of the VW Touareg.

James: you really like that?
Jeremy: yes.
James: you think that's fabulous?
Jeremy: yes.
James: you think it's better than a....Ford Explorer, for example?
Jeremy: obviously not....it's not that good.

 

[Nati]

I think it was in 3x06

Edit: My episode guide says it is, but watching the ep I found that the news are missing (it jumps from the hilux destruction to Hammond's review)
I never noticed that and now I can't find the full episode

 

[zoolean]

bolivia special
Clarkson: "This is cocaine country... Kate Moss' delicatessen."

 

[shellygrrl]

I think it was in 3x06

Edit: My episode guide says it is, but watching the ep I found that the news are missing (it jumps from the hilux destruction to Hammond's review)
I never noticed that and now I can't find the full episode

Probably because a BBC Two rip of it doesn't exist. Most, if not all, the S1-3 rips of TG on this site are taken from BBC Prime, so there are quite a few cuts.

 

[tezgm99]

thanks, Nati...I was living in New Zealand at the time so if a torrent can be found originating from there (channel is Prime TV), it will most likely have it in

 

[tezgm99]

I've noticed that with a bunch of early seasons as well, shelly....I think the whole first 2 seasons were only 45 minutes per episode

 

[L2D]

Richard made sure his tyre pressures were correct because if they were even slightly down it would cost him 20 miles, and I taped up my cracks. - James May
Season 12 Episode 4.

 

[Cobol74]

Ben Collins is a greedy twat.

J Clarkson.

 

[capra]

Ben Collins is a greedy twat.

J Clarkson.

My twat objects to the comparison.

 

[unbreakable]

Hammond: Stig! Give me the Cock! (runs after him)

May: We've lost both cocks.

 

[Z4MCoupe]

"0-60 takes three and a bit seconds, top speed is two hundred and [insert Lamborghini V12 sound here] tell you what lets find out..."

 

[Ravenlord]

Catching 7x02 on telly last night, JC had a great line in SIARPC: (already posted at the end of page 36, but it's hilarious)

Former soccer player Ian Wright: The Stig's the man, man. He's... you know, you can't see him, which is really weird just talking to a helmet all the time...

Jeremy interrupts, waving his hand at waist height: Richard Hammond talks to my helmet all day long.

<Everyone erupts into laughter>

 

[Lekky]

James May (multiple episodes): " I was the first to arrive and as you expect i have done things right .. "
James May (Every episode) : " Oh cock.."
Richard Hammond: " I Am A Driving God!! "
Jeremy Clarkson: " This car is call of duty 4... "
Jeremy Clarkson: "its like... Keira Knightley ... shes an ironing board with a face.. but she works..."