The Funny Maths Thread.. which sometimes contains mildly amusing pictures

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If you knew the sort of timed lights I had to endure in Syracuse, I would have floored it and ran over the traffic engineer. Then backed up a few times just for good measure. :mad:
 
The alt text for that:
You can look at practically any part of anything manmade around you and think 'some engineer was frustrated while designing this.' It's a little human connection.
 
Following up on Safety Anubis, and for lack of something better to do at work tonight...

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Dogbert said:
Following up on Safety Anubis, and for lack of something better to do at work tonight...

adviceanubis.jpg


ffff.gif
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I think you'll probably escape the ban there. Having said that, :lol: Nice post.
 
NooDle said:
Yo dawg....
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I forwarded that to a friend via facebook, and she said that as she opened the link, a co-worker had been there in her cubicle, explaining something. As the awesomeness of the Pilot Dog appeared on the screen, the co-worker had completely frozen mid-sentence :lol:
 
^ :lol:

This thread needs more Twilight abuse. Way more.
 
So having never seen the movies, or read the books, I decided to stop being an elitist fuck and read the Wikipedia cliffnotes of the plot.

Seventeen-year-old Isabella "Bella" Swan moves to Forks, a small town near Washington state's rugged coast, to live with her father, Charlie, after her mother remarries to a minor league baseball player. She is quickly befriended by many students at her new high school, but she is intrigued by the mysterious and aloof Cullen siblings. Bella sits next to Edward Cullen in biology class on her first day of school; he appears to be disgusted by her, much to Bella's confusion. A few days later, Bella is nearly struck by a van in the school parking lot. Edward inexplicably moves from some feet away and stops the vehicle with his hand. He later refuses to explain this act to Bella and warns her against befriending him.

After much research, Bella eventually discovers that Edward is a vampire, though he only consumes animal blood. The pair fall in love and Edward introduces Bella to his vampire family, Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie. Soon after, three nomadic vampires?James, Victoria, and Laurent?arrive. James, a tracker vampire, is intrigued by Edward's protectiveness over a human and wants to hunt Bella for sport. Edward and his family risk their lives to protect her, but James tracks Bella to Phoenix where she is hiding and lures her into a trap by claiming he is holding her mother hostage. James attacks Bella and bites her wrist, but Edward, along with the other Cullen family members, arrives before he can kill her. James is destroyed, and Edward sucks James's venom from Bella's wrist, preventing her from becoming a vampire. A severely injured Bella is taken to a hospital. Upon returning to Forks, Bella and Edward attend their school prom. While there, Bella expresses her desire to become a vampire, which Edward refuses. The film ends with Victoria secretly watching the pair dancing, plotting revenge for her lover James' murder.
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WHAT THE FUCK? IS THIS SHIT SERIOUSLY WHAT TEENAGE GIRLS ARE CREAMING THEIR PANTS OVER?

After much research, Bella eventually discovers that Edward is a vampire, though he only consumes animal blood. The pair fall in love and...
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:-?

Sorry, do continue with the funneh, I just had to interject that...
 
^:lmao:
I must admit, anal was the first thing that came to my mind when she said "why didn?t you turned me?"
 
^I was thinking of the same thing :lol:
it was more funny that way
 
Ok, I have not seen "Twilight." I have not read the books and I'll stick a soldering iron up my ass before I do either. For some reason that doesn't stop me from hating the entire phenomenon, and reading that Wiki article just pissed me off more.


  1. Twilight is not a fucking comic book. It's not based on a comic and it's not going to result in a comic. Get the fuck out of COMICON! Why the hell are middle-aged soccer moms from the midwest camping out for days and then filling the panel halls so they can say they caught a glimpse of some greasy guy with no personal hygiene while real comic fans are refused entry because the hall is full. These idiot women filled the hall all day and kept fans from hearing from greats like Eisner.
  2. It's not a Vampire movie. Question: What happens to a vampire in the sun? If you said "He gets all sparkly" then please stick a butter knife in your left eye. If you said "bursts into flames" then please turn to someone who said "sparkly" and stick a fork in his/her right eye. You know what Edward is? A pixie, a fairy, a sprite, (but he's not gay, I know plenty of gay guys and I don't want to insult them).
  3. Vampires are evil. They don't have relationships with their food anymore than you have sexual feelings about a steak dinner or a bowl of Rice Krispies (but if you do, then I'm not judging). Vampires don't go to prom, they don't go to school (even if they are immortally angsty 17 year olds). They eat people, and they don't feel bad about it. There has only been one relationship between a human and a vamp that resulted in any kind of mutual emotional connection. (If you are a fanboy like me then you know that the rebound thing with Spike was only physical)
/rant.

Someone call Buffy to stake this entire franchise.
 
My roommate got talked into reading twilight when it first came out because he didn't realize how bad it was. Now, he is an english major so he has read a LOT of books... Twilight is the first one that he couldn't finish. However, he gave me a basic summary of the plot and, well, my IQ has dropped considerably.

And guess what guys!??! Vampires GLITTER when they go in the sun!
 
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