The Gay Marriage Question Thread

The Gay Marriage Question Thread

  • Nothing wrong with it. It doesn't affect me so who am I to stand in the way of others' happiness?

    Votes: 130 90.9%
  • I don't really have any feelings either way.

    Votes: 10 7.0%
  • It's wrong because the religion I practise teaches that and so I believe it to be wrong.

    Votes: 1 0.7%
  • I think it's wrong but I can't think of any particular reason why.

    Votes: 2 1.4%

  • Total voters
    143

NecroJoe

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Note: Feel free to ignore this post as it really doesn't further the conversation, and isn't really a joke with a punchline...just an amusing annecdote I wanted to share that is only somewhat-related.

A couple jobs ago, I had two coworkers with different points of view. One was a self-described "devout christian" (referred to as DC from here on out) We would hear DC spout on and on about her faith, and "the gays" and how they should never EVER be allowed to marry and startedworking there shortly after I did. The other, just a cool chick (CC for the rest of the post) who had been working there for a couple years.

About 4 months into my stint at this place, CC, out of the blue in the middle of a long-ish work-day silence, asked DC a question. It took me by suprise, if for no other reason than it sounded completely thought-out and almost rehearsed...as if the 4 months of listening to "Jesus freak" had been building aggrivation up inside her and she had been preparing her "speech" for some time.

CC: "So...my husband and I have been married for 29 years, and we have no children. We met at church, and entered our marriage with the understanding that there would be no children, but still wanted to proclaim our life-long commitment to each other, our faith and to God. Because we entered this marriage knowing it would result in no children...what do you think of us?

DC: "You're sinners, and you're going to hell."

CC: "You honestly believe that?"

DC: "Yep."

CC: "We knew going into the marriage that there would be no children, because before we were married, we discovered that neither of us were physically capable of producing children. Hi was the result of testicular cancer before we met, and I had my own health problems after we met, but before we married."

DC: "(awkward pause, where you could tell DC didn't really know what to say, but didn't want to backtrack, and then was suddenly cock-sure)Doesn't matter. I'm assuming you have sex...it's no different than using birth control or having an abortion."

:blink:

Within one or two weeks, every person in this place of employment (a big-box office supply retail store) stopped even acknowledging DC. People no longer said "hi" or "bye." People stopped asking for her assistance, even if they needed it. They stopped answering DCs questions. When DC would call to double-check a schedule, or to call in sick one day, people just hung up. It was a depressing-as-hell place to work. I've never experienced anything like that before, or since.

After about a month of this conversation, and the couple weeks of being made an outcast, DC just stopped showing up. The Friday after everyone learned she had been let go for failing to show up for work, there was an impromptu ad-hoc after-work "BBQ" with no announcement. Barely anyone mentioned anything about the past month...and everyone was suddenly happier. :)

About 2 years after I left that job, one of my old co-workers sent me a link to DCs Friendster page. and I had to laugh.

:tvhappy:

I shit you not: not only divorced, but gay. How did we know? Photos of her commitment ceremony, with her new partner, in Hawaii.

:thumbsup:

[/coolstorybro]
 
Last edited:

rickhamilton620

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Re: The Gay Marriage Question Thread

Note: Feel free to ignore this post as it really doesn't further the conversation, and isn't really a joke with a punchline...just an amusing annecdote I wanted to share that is only somewhat-related.

A couple jobs ago, I had two coworkers with different points of view. One was a self-described "devout christian" (referred to as DC from here on out) We would hear DC spout on and on about her faith, and "the gays" and how they should never EVER be allowed to marry and startedworking there shortly after I did. The other, just a cool chick (CC for the rest of the post) who had been working there for a couple years.

About 4 months into my stint at this place, CC, out of the blue in the middle of a long-ish work-day silence, asked DC a question. It took me by suprise, if for no other reason than it sounded completely thought-out and almost rehearsed...as if the 4 months of listening to "Jesus freak" had been building aggrivation up inside her and she had been preparing her "speech" for some time.

CC: "So...my husband and I have been married for 29 years, and we have no children. We met at church, and entered our marriage with the understanding that there would be no children, but still wanted to proclaim our life-long commitment to each other, our faith and to God. Because we entered this marriage knowing it would result in no children...what do you think of us?

DC: "You're sinners, and you're going to hell."

CC: "You honestly believe that?"

DC: "Yep."

CC: "We knew going into the marriage that there would be no children, because before we were married, we discovered that neither of us were physically capable of producing children. Hi was the result of testicular cancer before we met, and I had my own health problems after we met, but before we married."

DC: "(awkward pause, where you could tell DC didn't really know what to say, but didn't want to backtrack, and then was suddenly cock-sure)Doesn't matter. I'm assuming you have sex...it's no different than using birth control or having an abortion."

:blink:

Within one or two weeks, every person in this place of employment (a big-box office supply retail store) stopped even acknowledging DC. People no longer said "hi" or "bye." People stopped asking for her assistance, even if they needed it. They stopped answering DCs questions. When DC would call to double-check a schedule, or to call in sick one day, people just hung up. It was a depressing-as-hell place to work. I've never experienced anything like that before, or since.

After about a month of this conversation, and the couple weeks of being made an outcast, DC just stopped showing up. The Friday after everyone learned she had been let go for failing to show up for work, there was an impromptu ad-hoc after-work "BBQ" with no announcement. Barely anyone mentioned anything about the past month...and everyone was suddenly happier. :)

About 2 years after I left that job, one of my old co-workers sent me a link to DCs Friendster page. and I had to laugh.

:tvhappy:

I shit you not: not only divorced, but gay. How did we know? Photos of her commitment ceremony, with her new partner, in Hawaii.

:thumbsup:

[/coolstorybro]
People still used friendster, even then? o_O
 

BlaRo

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Glad to see we're all pretty tolerant around here :)
 

CraigB

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The Gay Marriage Question Thread

I'd say younger people on the most are tolerant. Unless they are brainwashed by their parents as children.
 

nomix

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It was my knowledge that the civil partnership and a non-religious (civil) marriage had the same standing under UK law. A marriage under religion is another matter, then it is up to whatever religious body you want to get married within. Although (I may be wrong) I also thought a religious marriage has the same standing in law.
If that is so then the only problem is the perception, people (usually the highly religious and the elderly, I find) are going to see same sex marriage as "wrong" and "unworthy". That's entirely their opinion, they can think what they like.

Personally I'm not religious, so I wouldn't have a religious based marriage in a church with a priest and organist and top hats etc. For the majority of people it is merely a sign of commitment and a few legal standings which are identical across the board as far as I know.


As far as the UK class system goes there are only two really. The rich and the not-rich, same as with any other country, the class system of old is largely dead.
Seperate but equal. That's not good enough.

When I was speaking about class in Britian, I was more than anything else talking about a Britian before the war. Even if class as an issue isn't dead today.

Glad to see we're all pretty tolerant around here :)
My grandmother came to this earth in 1929. I don't know when her mother was born, but I know my grandmothers mother had no bad feelings about homosexuals. Not something to brag about, having a homosexual in your family, but not something to hate him or ignore him for. In the countryside. In the 30s. Says something.
 

mpicco

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I don't have any objection at all with anyone getting married to anyone else (as long as both parties are willing and consenting, of age, etc).
It's their life, not mine, and it doesn't affect me in the slightest.
 

ashspet

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Nothing wrong with it. It doesn't affect me so who am I to stand in the way of others' happiness?

I don't really have any feelings either way.

It's wrong because the religion I practise teaches that and so I believe it to be wrong.

I think it's wrong but I can't think of any particular reason why.
Where's the 'I support it and think that people should be able to marry whatever gender they want' option? This passive, 'they can do it if they want, I don't care' is exactly why it isn't recognised in so many places. If the majority of the population actually stood up to their elected officials and demanded it, then this debate wouldn't be happening (same with voluntary euthanasia, but that's a whole other kettle of piscine)

And yes, there are two different options. The Civil option courtesy of your local celebrant or registrar, or the marriage in the eyes of the deity of your choice. There are also a number of gender options and recognised categories for sexuality. Are you just thinking born/identifies as male marrying born/identifies as male partnerships, for example? Or are you also recognising that transvestite, transgender and intersex couples will also have the same rights?

The first - I think all couples, unionated (unionised, celebrated?) or in a recognised domestic partnership should have the same rights. Funny thing is, Centrelink (who managed statutory payments for the Australian Government) actually recognises many partnerships, simply because paying a pension at a Couple rate means they pay less than two Single rate pensions. Public Housing does too. Because it means the couple can share a room. Now, if the rest of the government would catch up, all would be good.

The Deity recognised marriage is already accepted. But, IMHO it's a short sighted church that excludes people based on how they identify sexually and who they sleep with. Their commitment and faith is not driven by what happens in the bedroom. And with the ongoing social acceptance in the general community, you ostracise those people who are conflicted about having and supporting their friends that are LGBTTI and may exclude themselves from the religious community because they cannot reconcile the two. Churches, and the views of leadership, do change over time. But, like government, it is the membership that has to drive it. If everyone who went to church this week in Australia told their minister / priest / Imam etc that the would not be back until LGBTTI marriages were accepted (and stuck to it), there would be some changes.
 

Heathrow

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Where's the 'I support it and think that people should be able to marry whatever gender they want' option? This passive, 'they can do it if they want, I don't care' is exactly why it isn't recognised in so many places. If the majority of the population actually stood up to their elected officials and demanded it, then this debate wouldn't be happening (same with voluntary euthanasia, but that's a whole other kettle of piscine)

And yes, there are two different options. The Civil option courtesy of your local celebrant or registrar, or the marriage in the eyes of the deity of your choice. There are also a number of gender options and recognised categories for sexuality. Are you just thinking born/identifies as male marrying born/identifies as male partnerships, for example? Or are you also recognising that transvestite, transgender and intersex couples will also have the same rights?

The first - I think all couples, unionated (unionised, celebrated?) or in a recognised domestic partnership should have the same rights. Funny thing is, Centrelink (who managed statutory payments for the Australian Government) actually recognises many partnerships, simply because paying a pension at a Couple rate means they pay less than two Single rate pensions. Public Housing does too. Because it means the couple can share a room. Now, if the rest of the government would catch up, all would be good.
Ah, good point. I probably worded my respnse too pasively as well. I do support the changing of the law here to stop what was essentially state sponsored prejudice on sexual orientation grounds.

In England, the registrar does still have a choice whether to perform a civil partnership ceremony of same sex couples.

HE CAN QUIT HIS JOB! Otherwise not.

Local Holy man/woman representing some diety or group, still has a choice, but their ceremonies are not recognised in law. The couple still need to go to a registrar, I think. (Except CoE.)

The Deity recognised marriage is already accepted. But, IMHO it's a short sighted church that excludes people based on how they identify sexually and who they sleep with. Their commitment and faith is not driven by what happens in the bedroom. And with the ongoing social acceptance in the general community, you ostracise those people who are conflicted about having and supporting their friends that are LGBTTI and may exclude themselves from the religious community because they cannot reconcile the two. Churches, and the views of leadership, do change over time. But, like government, it is the membership that has to drive it. If everyone who went to church this week in Australia told their minister / priest / Imam etc that the would not be back until LGBTTI marriages were accepted (and stuck to it), there would be some changes.
That would help to change things, very good idea.
 

Cobol74

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I think that is about right, I agree with Mr Fry.

Perhaps it's the fear of the unknown, until recently, very, very few homosexuals came out so they were hidden, safe for people to hate without embarrassment, and some people need people to hate (Like the Taliban perhaps?).
 

GerFix

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I am pleased by this thread's results. Wished more people here were more open minded and didn't look at gay people as freaks but as just normal people that can love and feel just like anyone else.
To whoever voted that it's wrong but with no real reason why - please go die in a fire.
I used to support the push to allow gay marriage to be recognised in the eyes of the law, but over the last year (or so) I have been most unimpressed with the attitudes of other supporters towards those who oppose it. They talk about being open-minded whilst simultaneously dismissing the opposite point of view (often with extreme vitriol). They think they have the moral high ground. What arrogance. What hypocrisy. Don't expect others to be open-minded, when you yourself are not.

I am increasingly intolerant of intolerance and would vote on this poll if it wasn't worded in such a sentimental and biased way. What I would've liked to have seen was a few more options for those who favour gay marriage, like: "Nothing wrong with it. Supporting it makes me feel morally superior to those who don't" or "Nothing wrong with it. I support it because I think it will win me friends".

I, by the way, wouldn't vote for either of these. I'd vote for "I don't give a flying fuck either way any more".
 

GRtak

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Have you ever heard the phrase "there is an asshole in every crowd"? Those are the people you are describing.
 

GerFix

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^ unfortunately for this cause, they are the ones making the most noise.
 

remizak

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Its like that with anything in the media though that's why you see all the bat shit crazy republicans on tv and rarely hear about any moderates. It improves ratings, ratings sell ad spots. Welcome to capitalism.
 

GerFix

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^ True, but it doesn't detract from the damage done to this cause (in my eyes, at least).
 
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