The Simile and Metaphor Thread

[MWF]

I think thanks at least in part to I find myself coming up with a lot of similes and metaphors in everyday conversations and interactions and I started pondering whether anyone else is similarly afflicted.

To kick things off here's a line from an email I sent to a colleague in another office who was asking about my new car:

"it's got a sheaf of history thicker than a sedated Scouser and pulls like a naked Johnny Depp in a girls' finishing school."

 

[NecroJoe]

I like making them up from non sequiturs. "Wow, this food is spicier than Tony Danza getting an Audio Daily Double on 'Jeopardy'" or something like "Whoa, that fish smells as bad as a ladybug electrician from Vermont."

 

[Shentar]

I'm waiting for the opportunity to use the following in a conversation: "Its like a pick-pocket at Auschwitz.. It just doesn't matter"

 

[gaasc]

Well this thread is going to be as colorful as Cave Johnson trying to discuss Artificial Intelligence with Edmund Blackadder.