The UK 'Rudetrip' Concept (Matt2k's Brain Dump)

Matt2000

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This is something I've been working on (and threatening people with) since lockdown last year and as you're reading these words it means I've finally bothered to write them all out.

It's a simple, some could say childish plan to drive from Twatt in Orkney, via John O'Groats, north to south via places with rude names. There are lots of them in England, particularly in the east where the yokels live. Scotland is a bit lighter but the scenery should make up for it.

Currently it's split over 9 days, with a 10th day route reserved for the mad dash towards Dover for cross-Channel Ringmeet shenanigans. At this point the easiest way for me to plan it was to assume only Tesla superchargers are available and tweak the route to make that possible, it's actually totally possible on paper but that will be influenced by driving 'style'. The charger near Penrith is down right now so that's ignored for this and I'd have to slum it with an Instavolt or two.

Here's an overview of the route:
RudetripOverview_S1920.jpg

Map
Below are the waypoints for each day, exact route between them is fluid.

Day 1 - Scottish isles and Scotland
Twatt, Orkney
John O'Groats (via ferry)
Inverness (supercharger)
Backside, Huntly
Aberdeen (overnight)
Approx. Distance: 292mi/470km
Estimated time: 8 hrs
Map

Day 2 - Scotland
Aberdeen (supercharger)
Cock Bridge
Perth (supercharger)
East Breast (meet Captain 70s somewhere in between?)
Dick Place, Edinburgh (overnight)
Approx. Distance: 282mi/454km
Estimated time: 7 hrs 20
Map

Day 3 - Scotland and Northern England
Edinburgh
Abington (supercharger)
New Cumnock
Cumnock
Cairnryan (a random waypoint to create a more scenic coastal route)
Gretna Green (supercharger)
Cockermouth (overnight)
Approx. Distance: 262mi/422km
Estimated driving time: 6 hrs 16
Map

Day 4 - Northern England to Midlands-ish
Penrith (maybe charger - visit Andeh?)
Glenridding (nice road)
Kendal
Kirkby Lonsdale (maybe - Instavolt)
Settle
Rimswell
Scunthorpe
Penistone
Crowden (random campsite I found near the place I bought the V8 Disco)
Approx. Distance: 301mi/484km
Estimated driving time: 8 hrs 14
Map

Day 5 - Midlands to East Anglia
Barnsely (pronounced Barns-leh, supercharger)
Cock Alley
Bitchfield
Dyke
Deeping St Nicholas (read - deep in St Nicholas...)
Ring's end
Feltwell
Methwold (because it's on the way so why not?)
King's Lynn (supercharger)
Docking
Hunstanton, passing Lousy Bush Wood (overnight, building sandcastles)
Approx. Distance: 224mi/361km
Estimated driving time: 6 hrs
Map

Day 6 - More East Anglia
Dicks Mount
Wangford
Cockfield
Burnt Dick Hill
Colchester (supercharger)
Fingringhoe
Clacton-on-sea (overnight if we survive)
Approx. Distance: 192mi/309km
Estimated driving time: 5 hrs 23
Map

Day 7
Dartford (supercharger, big bridge and all that)
Shellow Bowells
Thong
Lower Dicker
Upper Dicker
Fulking (close enough)
Brighton (overnight, again if we survive)
Approx. Distance: 254mi/409km
Estimated driving time: 5 hrs 57
Map

Day 8
Balls Cross
Titty Hill
Cocking
Arnesbury (supercharger)
Droop
Shitterton
Weymouth (overnight, another classic English seaside town)
Approx. Distance: 204mi/328km
Estimated driving time: 5 hrs 31
Map

Day 9
Exeter (supercharger)
Hoe Park
Crapstone
Lifton (supercharger)
Brown Willy (it's a hill, climbing optional or it could just be passed)
Land's End
Approx. Distance: 232mi/373km
Estimated driving time: 5 hrs 24
Map

Let me know what you think of this lunacy, I'm just glad to have it down on here so it isn't just taking up space in my brain that I need for breathing and stuff. :LOL:
 
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leviathan

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I like the idea, and hypothetically would even like to join. Presumably not this summer, but later in the year or some time in 2022 this kind of stuff might become feasible. Last time I've been to the UK was... 2001? I think, so it's about damn time to catch up.

On the route itself: days with over 400km of driving are, in my limited roadtripping experience, quite exhausting. 300-350km seems to be at least my personal limit for B-road enjoyment in a single day. May be doable if there are longer "transit" stretches of highway in there, haven't looked at the days in detail (yet).
 

Matt2000

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It's all theoretical, it can go ahead if and when it suits as hopefully our freedom to do this won't go anywhere once it returns! The last roadtrip was great fun even when things went wrong.

I hadn't put much thought into the days and it's definitely open to adjustment, I thought 9 days was already pushing the limit of what would be considered reasonable for people though and that's without really researching places in Scotland and of course transit to Twatt for the start.

Bill Bailey Live (2013) Qualmpeddler 720P x264 RB58.mp4_snapshot_01.10.22.364.jpg
 

Misrabelle

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Of course this sounds like fun!
Team Texas may recall the conversation that lead to Der Stig's updated forum location, leaving us crying from laughter.
This is right up the average Finalgearian's alley.

Since currently Aussies can only go to NZ, I'm looking at doing an NZ road trip, but that's likely to have to bo a solo venture.
 

DanRoM

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@Matt2000 This looks good, I'm interested - for 2023 I guess. :D

I'm with @leviathan on the subject of distance per day. On country roads and with sightseeing and lunch stops, 400 km is a bit much.

Also, I'd be declared completely insane by everyone I know outside of FG, plus by myself, if I went up to the Orkney Islands just to turn around and go back. This starting point would require an extended stay of a couple of days on the islands before the trip starts.

From a continental-European perspective this trip also lacks Wales. Wales is awesome. We could just pretend their place names mean something rude. :D
 
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Misrabelle

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No need to pretend, found some!

  • Bullyhole Bottom, Monmouthshire, Wales, UK
  • Cat’s Ash, Monmouthshire, Wales
  • Pant-y-Wacco, Wales, UK
  • Penisarwaen, village in Gwynedd, UK
  • Sodom, Flintshire, Wales, UK
  • Splott, Cardiff, Wales
  • St.Mellons, Cardiff
  • Stop-and-Call, Pembrokeshire, UK
  • Tarts Hill, Flintshire, Wales, UK
  • Three Cocks, Breconshire, Wales, UK
More here
 

Matt2000

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I did look at it a few times and think it was a shame to miss Wales, however I just assumed that the names would be gibberish. Those are perfect. :ROFLMAO:

I guess this would be more like a 12 day trip then, I'm not sure how Wales would be included. There's a big gap between Cocking and Droop in the south of England, maybe we could head north-west at the Arenesby point perhaps, go up via Bristol to do a curly Wales loop and come back down? I'd love to go over to the Isle of Man during the trip if at all possible.

I totally understand the pointlessness of going to Orkney just for the start so a couple of days there would be completely reasonable. Shame that they never built the Kirkwall tunnel or it would be much more simple.

Edit: I just mapped those Wales locations and they can conveniently form a lovely loop. I'd really like to go back to that place we stayed at on Anglesey, that was superb. It also passes close to the Ffestniniog railway, maybe a nice place to get away from driving.

1619370861330.png
 
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Misrabelle

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And how does that fit into the overall map?
My brain enjoys squiggly blue lines on maps, to really appreciate the stupidity of the things we do.
 

Matt2000

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Your wish is my command!

RudetripWales2_stitch.jpg

Updated Map

The route now includes a loop-de-loop, it's completely insane! :LOL:

I've also added a placeholder for the Isle of Man and added Wetwang (F, north-east of Leeds) as we would be close anyway. I've hit the limit for layers and destinations within layers now. :p

I'll re-shuffle days to reduce the distance and time. I think the first day would remain as is because it's mostly A-roads and there isn't really anywhere else to go apart from Aberdeen.

Edit: Further tweaked to change the route from North Wales, back down. It now passes through Bethesda, which I imagine is a very glitchy town.
 
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NooDle

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This is brilliant in every way!
I understand the ‘400 kms is way too much per day’ brigade, but being in an ev and thus, having to stop every couple of hours to charge anyway, means you’ll be a lot more relaxed.

I did a 700 km trip a few weeks ago in my eGolf and wasn’t even tired. I know, doing this days on end does add to the overall fatigue, but still, I think you’ll be fine with 400ish kms per day (which in your case, conveniently coincides with the range on a full battery).

We will need pictures of you standing beside roadsigns with ridiculous names though. For ... science? Yes, for science!
 

MWF

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Colour me distinctly interested. Might only be able to do a few days near our neck of the woods but give us enough notice and I re kon we will be involved.
 

Misrabelle

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This is brilliant in every way!
I understand the ‘400 kms is way too much per day’ brigade, but being in an ev and thus, having to stop every couple of hours to charge anyway, means you’ll be a lot more relaxed.

I did a 700 km trip a few weeks ago in my eGolf and wasn’t even tired. I know, doing this days on end does add to the overall fatigue, but still, I think you’ll be fine with 400ish kms per day (which in your case, conveniently coincides with the range on a full battery).

We will need pictures of you standing beside roadsigns with ridiculous names though. For ... science? Yes, for science!
There is also the slight matter of no one ever being ready at the time we've said we'd be ready by.
So we leave late, have unplanned stops, coffee breaks, and/or the group gets split up, meaning we have to rendevous again, and so we don't get to our destination until many hours later than intended.
 

93Flareside

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There is also the slight matter of no one ever being ready at the time we've said we'd be ready by.
So we leave late, have unplanned stops, coffee breaks, and/or the group gets split up, meaning we have to rendevous again, and so we don't get to our destination until many hours later than intended.

@DaBoom had planned Swisstaly as most days being only 6-7hrs of drive time per day and with the FG crew even that was pushing it most days.
 

NooDle

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Hadn’t thought of that. Good point. You can plan all you want but your arrival time is dictated by the slowest/laziest person in the group...
 

DanRoM

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I think the basic premise of this roadtrip is understandably being done from a UK resident perspective, with the premises of a) crossing the country end to end and b) the main focus of selfies next to signs with funny place names. Which is brillant, of course. :)

But I cannot help but look at it from a FG roadtrip perspective with the typical constraints and the focus on good driving roads, and there's a few things that nag me a bit:
  • Is going through East Anglia really worth it in terms of roads and sights, just for the shits and giggles of a few town signs? I admit I know nothing about the area, but it never comes up when talking about great driving areas in Great Britain (basically Scotland, Lake District, Wales).
  • Going all the way to Land's End and then crossing back east to go to the continent via Dover also seems like a huuuuuge detour.
  • Visiting the Isle of Man would be awesome in itself, but the ferry adds a fairly big cost in terms of both money and time to the trip.
@Matt2000, I really don't want to rain on your parade, it's just a few things to consider. I realize there are always compromises to be made. :)
I haven't been on the previous UK trip a few years ago, how does this compare in terms of distance?
 

93Flareside

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Isle of Man and Wales can be its own trip. This is purely a rude name roadtrip for the lulz. I missed the oppurtunity to take a picture of the Titisee sign when I was there in 2019. :(
 

Matt2000

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Nobody's raining on any parades, it's all just for playing around with and laughing at for now, if we can make an international-friendly trip of it then that's great. As it stands it's more of a 'I've been made redundant with 3 months pay and I'm going to blow it on a 3 week roadtrip' kind of thing. 😄

Great driving roads weren't taken into account too much but can be slotted in where appropriate. East Anglia doesn't have any mountain passes but it does have interesting roads from a touring aspect.

Wales has plenty of rude place names so could earn itself a place in the trip, IOM has none that I can find, sadly.

Also after my alarm went off this morning I went back to sleep by mistake and had a quick dream about driving the Smart and visiting Fingringhoe as part of a roadtrip. :LOL:
 
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