BlaRo
Little Nudger
Hey, no crying to the government if you can't handle your crippling addictions. That's your own problem, bucko.
And gang violence will be dealt with by robots! It IS a win-win situation!
The "When I come to power I will......" Thread
- Thread starter MWF
- Start date
Hey, no crying to the government if you can't handle your crippling addictions. That's your own problem, bucko.
And gang violence will be dealt with by robots! It IS a win-win situation!
Cowboy
My name is Sheridan
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2009
- Messages
- 10,140
Exept when all your minions start overdosing your gonna run out of slave labourers
TC
aka TomCat
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2005
- Messages
- 11,432
Exept when all your minions start overdosing your gonna run out of slave labourers
Survival of the fittest. Gotta weed out the weaklings somehow.
spicysaurus
Well-Known Member
Exept when all your minions start overdosing your gonna run out of slave labourers
I said minions, not slaves. The slaves are a totally different caste.
Cowboy
My name is Sheridan
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2009
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- 10,140
I said minions, not slaves. The slaves are a totally different caste.
So witch cast where you gonna use as your.....euhrmm....'fysical aids' again?
I'd like to take this time to discuss my base of operations. There will be several, scattered across the world's continents. #1 will be in the frozen wastes of Canada to provide a safe place in the initial unstable stages of my reign. Other locations will ultimately include one in the deserts of California or Nevada, one in the eastern mountain ranges of the US, one in the Alps, one in South America, one in Germany, one on the Isle of Man, one near Baghdad, several throughout Russia and its affiliated nations, three in China, two in Australia, one in Egypt, one in South Africa, one in the Amazon Rainforest, and one in Antarctica (why? Because I can do that.)
On the surface, each base will have only one visible structure: A massive runway. The runway will be camoflauged to its natural surroundings and unlit - but will be fitted with infrared illumination that can be switched on to allow landing by a properly equipped pilot. The runway will also be fully equipped for whatever the current autoland standards of the day are - and that, too, will be switched off unless needed. At either end of the runway, there will be a VAST aircraft elevator - big enough for an An-225 at the very least (why? Because I am TOTALLY taking both of them for my personal use and restarting/rebuilding the production lines). This will descend to a huge underground taxiway (aircraft will be under tow, naturally) which will descend until there's 100ft of dirt and concrete overhead, merging with the one from the opposite end of the runway on the way - at which point there will be 30 aircraft bunkers sized for An-225's (smaller aircraft will share).
A pair of alert fighter squadrons will also be in smaller, individual aircraft bunkers at the top of the taxiway system, directly adjacent to the elevator - one squadron at each end of the runway. The idea is that in the event of a threat, you can throw a half dozen planes onto each elevator at once, and take off from opposing ends of the runway (taking turns, obviously) to get the maximum number of aircraft in the air in the shortest amount of time. Also stationed at the top will be two small, fast transports suitable for a GTFO evacuation that needs to take place too quickly to drag something bigger and badasser up the incline.
The lower aircraft bunker complex will be equipped for all scheduled service and moderate repairs, complete with a spares store for all based aircraft. Munitions stores will be located directly beneath the aircraft bunkers and accessible directly via elevator. A 10-day aviation fuel supply will be fed from an external pipeline system (which can be cut off and resupplied by air if necessary) into a vast tank system located beneath the munitions stores.
At any rate, beyond the aircraft bunkers, the taxiway will terminate in two large vehicle garages - one for my toys, one for my military contingent and the vehicles necessary to operate the airport. These will be self-sufficient and capable of doing everything short of building a whole new vehicle from scratch.
After the world stabilizes a little, adjacent to these bunkers will be a rail depot that links to the external rail network by way of a heavily secured tunnel dozens if not hundred of miles away in a discreet location - this provides the only other way in and will only be opened for trains operated by the military and carrying supplies or passengers for the facility. Rails in the tunnel will be electric - this will be the ONLY instance where military-operated trains will use electric motive power - diesel or nuclear steam turbine will be employed throughout the rest of the network to prevent sabotage and simply because the rest of the network may not be entirely electrified. The electric locomotives will be stored in the tunnel and will tow the complete train in and out.
Electrical power will be provided by an external feed with a backup nuclear reactor.
Beyond the rail complex will lie two paths. The first path will lead to an underground hotel (aiming for 4 star condo-suite type) for visitors, dignitaries (special rooms) and staff. Even soldiers will get a nice cushy suite to go home to at the end of the shift.
The other path is much more interesting. It's a vehicle tunnel that will lead through several security checkpoints before reaching a large downward spiral ramp (it will also have a passenger elevator down the center of the spiral). 600ft down the spiral, you will actually reach the presidential palace.
On the surface, each base will have only one visible structure: A massive runway. The runway will be camoflauged to its natural surroundings and unlit - but will be fitted with infrared illumination that can be switched on to allow landing by a properly equipped pilot. The runway will also be fully equipped for whatever the current autoland standards of the day are - and that, too, will be switched off unless needed. At either end of the runway, there will be a VAST aircraft elevator - big enough for an An-225 at the very least (why? Because I am TOTALLY taking both of them for my personal use and restarting/rebuilding the production lines). This will descend to a huge underground taxiway (aircraft will be under tow, naturally) which will descend until there's 100ft of dirt and concrete overhead, merging with the one from the opposite end of the runway on the way - at which point there will be 30 aircraft bunkers sized for An-225's (smaller aircraft will share).
A pair of alert fighter squadrons will also be in smaller, individual aircraft bunkers at the top of the taxiway system, directly adjacent to the elevator - one squadron at each end of the runway. The idea is that in the event of a threat, you can throw a half dozen planes onto each elevator at once, and take off from opposing ends of the runway (taking turns, obviously) to get the maximum number of aircraft in the air in the shortest amount of time. Also stationed at the top will be two small, fast transports suitable for a GTFO evacuation that needs to take place too quickly to drag something bigger and badasser up the incline.
The lower aircraft bunker complex will be equipped for all scheduled service and moderate repairs, complete with a spares store for all based aircraft. Munitions stores will be located directly beneath the aircraft bunkers and accessible directly via elevator. A 10-day aviation fuel supply will be fed from an external pipeline system (which can be cut off and resupplied by air if necessary) into a vast tank system located beneath the munitions stores.
At any rate, beyond the aircraft bunkers, the taxiway will terminate in two large vehicle garages - one for my toys, one for my military contingent and the vehicles necessary to operate the airport. These will be self-sufficient and capable of doing everything short of building a whole new vehicle from scratch.
After the world stabilizes a little, adjacent to these bunkers will be a rail depot that links to the external rail network by way of a heavily secured tunnel dozens if not hundred of miles away in a discreet location - this provides the only other way in and will only be opened for trains operated by the military and carrying supplies or passengers for the facility. Rails in the tunnel will be electric - this will be the ONLY instance where military-operated trains will use electric motive power - diesel or nuclear steam turbine will be employed throughout the rest of the network to prevent sabotage and simply because the rest of the network may not be entirely electrified. The electric locomotives will be stored in the tunnel and will tow the complete train in and out.
Electrical power will be provided by an external feed with a backup nuclear reactor.
Beyond the rail complex will lie two paths. The first path will lead to an underground hotel (aiming for 4 star condo-suite type) for visitors, dignitaries (special rooms) and staff. Even soldiers will get a nice cushy suite to go home to at the end of the shift.
The other path is much more interesting. It's a vehicle tunnel that will lead through several security checkpoints before reaching a large downward spiral ramp (it will also have a passenger elevator down the center of the spiral). 600ft down the spiral, you will actually reach the presidential palace.
Cobol74
Forum Addict
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When I come to power I will ban the words Climate Change as scare tactics. The Climate is always, and has always changed FCS. Its is either Global Warming or Global Cooling but NOT Climate Change.
I will get the Fish back.
I will stop Somali Pirates - dead (sic).
I will fix the English Education System so people get a chance of social mobility again.
I will figure out why all the sodding jobs are going offshore and fix it.
I will sort out the Banks - step 1 will be: that no Director of a Bank can hold office without an accredited Banking qualification. step 2 Bonuses to be super taxed at 101% - that will stop that lark! Step 3: measures taken to circumvent step 2 will be a Criminal offence! Get out of that!
Some interesting reading. .. (No it really is).
http://www.fool.co.uk/news/investin...t-banker-bonuses.aspx?source=ufwflwlnk0000001
That brings us to 2009
Over the past year, substantially all investment banking profits have come from fixed-income trading. Moreover, nearly every bank's earnings came from this segment, not just a smart few.
This happened for one of two reasons: (a) Every fixed-income trader suddenly woke up in early 2009 with newfound brilliance; or (b) they're riding the largest wave of cheap money in history, financed by central banks lending money at 0% that traders then use to buy ultra-safe government securities yielding 2%-4%. Guess which one.
Furthermore, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers were allowed to die while others seemed chosen at random to be saved, eroding competition for the lucky survivors.
How are these factors -- all completely outside bankers' control -- accounted for when determining compensation? They aren't.
That's what's really infuriating about banker pay. It isn't that they're earning mountains of money. It's that they're earning mountains of money based on factors they had nothing to do with.
I will get the Fish back.
I will stop Somali Pirates - dead (sic).
I will fix the English Education System so people get a chance of social mobility again.
I will figure out why all the sodding jobs are going offshore and fix it.
I will sort out the Banks - step 1 will be: that no Director of a Bank can hold office without an accredited Banking qualification. step 2 Bonuses to be super taxed at 101% - that will stop that lark! Step 3: measures taken to circumvent step 2 will be a Criminal offence! Get out of that!
Some interesting reading. .. (No it really is).
http://www.fool.co.uk/news/investin...t-banker-bonuses.aspx?source=ufwflwlnk0000001
That brings us to 2009
Over the past year, substantially all investment banking profits have come from fixed-income trading. Moreover, nearly every bank's earnings came from this segment, not just a smart few.
This happened for one of two reasons: (a) Every fixed-income trader suddenly woke up in early 2009 with newfound brilliance; or (b) they're riding the largest wave of cheap money in history, financed by central banks lending money at 0% that traders then use to buy ultra-safe government securities yielding 2%-4%. Guess which one.
Furthermore, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers were allowed to die while others seemed chosen at random to be saved, eroding competition for the lucky survivors.
How are these factors -- all completely outside bankers' control -- accounted for when determining compensation? They aren't.
That's what's really infuriating about banker pay. It isn't that they're earning mountains of money. It's that they're earning mountains of money based on factors they had nothing to do with.
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Doctor Blade
Well-Known Member
In my realm, the people got tired of fixing people who didn't want face reality. But since quantum physics tells us there's more than one world: you can run yours the way you like.
Cowboy
My name is Sheridan
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Nope....but its the best proposal I have seen in this thread so run with it :lol:
MWF
Now needs wood
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When I come to power I will ban woodchip wallpaper. It's use will be punishable by death from sodomy from an angry rhinocerous.
This thread has been unearthed from a shallow grave byconstruction workers a home decorator.
Because ofParkinsons Tourettes.
This thread has been unearthed from a shallow grave by
Because of
Cold Fussion
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Carpet bomb Adelaide into the stone age.
jedd_kenobi
Forum Addict
i'd probably start with carpet bombing Toys R Us at the moment.
Jay
the fool on the hill
Anyone uttering the phrase "inevitable zombie apocalypse" will be sent to Thailand, forced to have a sex change, made a sex slave and forever be buttfucked by unattractive overweight tourists.
MadCat360
Forum Addict
I would be the first nation to hold a Grand Prix on the surface of the moon.
The day after I would announce my plans to put F1 cars on Mars by 2050.
The day after I would announce my plans to put F1 cars on Mars by 2050.
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When I come to power, I'm going to remove Thanksgiving and Valentine's Day from the calendar. Be thankful and love one another EVERY day, minions. That is an order.
Political ads shall be kept to a minimum. Anyone using their faith to get votes in my non-theocratic state will be forced to donate to the Evil Overlord's Carrera Fund.
I will commission a Puffalump yak from Fisher-Price. Puffalumps are cool. Yaks are cool. Thus, a Puffalump yak shall be awesome enough to man the state's Complaint Department when we stick MadCat360 in charge of building more racetracks.
Political ads shall be kept to a minimum. Anyone using their faith to get votes in my non-theocratic state will be forced to donate to the Evil Overlord's Carrera Fund.
I will commission a Puffalump yak from Fisher-Price. Puffalumps are cool. Yaks are cool. Thus, a Puffalump yak shall be awesome enough to man the state's Complaint Department when we stick MadCat360 in charge of building more racetracks.
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When I come to power I will declare all chocolate-covered pretzels be provided for free to the masses. Also, chocolate covered espresso beans.