The Final Gear Wacky Races - RACE THREAD.

Time to use up the last of the annoyingly overpowered boost system, which causes a huge eruption of noise, tyre smoke and the usual big smoke coming out of the back. The car goes round five corners completely sideways before bouncing off the wall and losing a wing mirror, some chrome trim and the rear bumper, but keeps fifth, then crashes through the road block thankfully already destroyed by the Canyonaro
 
The pit manoeuvre causes me to loose a couple of places, and i join up in 6th just behind a fire. At least I think it's a fire. I take to the grass to try and get some clear air, then realise I hit my face on the Land Rover's solid dashboard and broke my nose.

as I look in the cubby box for a tissue to clear up the blood, the Landy hits a pothole in the grass and the front suspension is smashed, leaving the car leaning and one of the rear wheels off the ground. Time to use 4WD and get back alongside the sick Granada, avoiding chrome blades being thrown from the car.
 
I dispatch a first aid and self repair kit for matt2000, now I am just behind Gman and am ready to continue this epic battle.



OT

I propose the title "Competitor of the first ever FG Wacky Race" for everyone who competed.

OT
 
Gman and Lurker once again notice LeMans GTR in their rear-view mirrored triple-story BBQ spoiler grill.

Whilst getting ready to shoot the sheeps, hippos AND chickens, Lurker hands Gman a giant sausage. When Gman inquires why, Lurker simply replies "Cook it".

Cook it indeed.
 
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The rather broken Granada and the even more broken Land Rover rocket down the main straight, althrough nobody can actually see who is ahead due to the enormous clouds of smoke. Eventually the Landy emerges ahead, due to a slight distraction for Team Parklife with the dashboard detatching itself at top whack. With Tyrone now acting as a structurally integral part of it, I keep my foot on the floor and try to keep up. Not long now!
 
I enter stealth mode and drive onto the walls overtaking Gman in the process!.
 
After wasting valuable minutes, trying to cook a 3 meter frankfurter on the George Foremanator's lean mean cooking grill machine spoiler and feeding Lurker, we set off once again!

As we drove along, we decided to turn on our bright green quadruple halogen stadium lamp headlights, when astonishingly we notice LeMans in front of us! How did that happen!? If it were not for our bright green stadium lights - which we'd taken from a certain famous cricket ground in Melbourne and had painted green - LeMans might have got away with his sneaky move!

After sweeping a bend and finding ourselves on a main straight, Lurker engages the jets on the spoiler and with a nervous "Baaaa" from one of the sheeps the George Foremanator blasts past LeMans!
 
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FDaihatsu team is in race up and steady in 13th place. FD tries to overtake but there's no use; the competitors are just too good. Time to use the second eBay item: Mitsubishi Evo's turbocharger! after install, The Copen roars into the 10th place and gathering speed quite scarily. other teams aware! Tiny Daihatsu turbocharged Keicar is on the way!
 
Noticing the drift I drive and clip onto the side of Gman's car and activated the thrusters which start to incinerate the cockpit of the George Formanatator.
 
Lurker in an almost Oregon Trail-like manner has contracted syphilis!

What the hell was he doing to those sheep? :blink:
 
Having finally woken back up, we call the miraculously unharmed Lola back into the pits. A thoroughly exhausted Clay is helped out, and I climb in for the final sprint. With the stickiest tyres we have (red scrubs, named for the red sidewalls, like the white stripe on the softer tyres in F1) squeezing some extra power out of the engine (about 1,750hp) and a do or die attitude, I begin to attack the leaders for position. This is where the foul play really begins. I toss the slick grenade behind me, covering the road behind us in a layer of Flynns tears for Hamilton. A chemical mixed in, when, exposed to air, causes the water to freeze quickly. I am also seen loading an M4 carbine...
 
The Mexicans* take the brunt of the jets! MEXICAN MEATSHEILDS FTMFW!

Lurker promptly turns the jets off, and Gman and Lurker are left with BBQ Mexicans. After eating the 3 meter frankfurter and unable to find any more room for the Mexicans, Lurker decides to save them for later (snack). Re-engaging the jets, The George Foremanator zooms forward once more in pursuit of LeMan's DB9!


*Note: No Mexicans were harmed, eaten or BBQ'ed during the process of this post. Any resemblance to reality is a total co-incidence.

edit: AAAAAAAND LURKER IS HERE! W00000t!
 
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I activate the QBoost and deploy porno mags in hopes of distracting Gman and Lurker
 
Team FD, now in 9th place, is going ever faster, with 10 mins to finish, there's nothing that can go wrong! :D
 
Using quick thinking and some A1 BBQ sauce, Lurker realizes that sheep + mexicans make Shexicans.... or meep.... and so preps the feeding tube with his newfound formula.

Meep + BBQ sauce = scramjet turbo power.

With only a few moments to go, Lurker prays to the God of thunder (aka the engine in the George Foremanator) for some guidance.
 
LurkerPatrol said:
Using quick thinking and some A1 BBQ sauce, Lurker realizes that sheep + mexicans make Shexicans.... or meep.... and so preps the feeding tube with his newfound formula.

Meep + BBQ sauce = scramjet turbo power.

With only a few moments to go, Lurker prays to the God of thunder (aka the engine in the George Foremanator) for some guidance.
Click to expand...

All while Gman has his 'turn' with a certain sheep.
 
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