Killing Your Heart with Punisher Bass (56k go order pizza)

[Punisher Bass]

A new day, a new breakfast entry. Today we're going to tackle the only worthwhile thing the french gave us, croissants. Yeah you can buy shitty ones from Jack In The Box or decent ones from Burger King, but I prefer to make my own, you just can't beat the taste.

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_1.jpg

Hardware

1 large skillet.
1 medium skillet. (check out my new stainless steel pans!)
Tongs.
Spatual.

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_2.jpg

Software.

Eggs.
Cheese. You can use any kind you want, I prefer american.
Bacon(!).
Croissants. They come in different sizes and these are labeled Large. I'm making 8 today because if I don't they are going to go stale.

Begin by heating up the large skillet and throw in some strips of bacon. As always, just how much you put in is up to you. I like bacon so I'll cook the whole package and keep the unused stuff for later. Also this is another really good time to have a splatter shield on hand. Not only will it protect you from the odd oversized pop of grease that burns your hand, but it keeps the stove top clean and the glasses on your face.

Anyway, cooking bacon is very easy, so easy that you should already know how to cook it (ie: throw in pan, wait to turn crispy).

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_3.jpg

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_4.jpg

With the bacon done, set it aside in the same place you hid the country potatoes yesterday when you made steak n eggs. Grab the eggs and a big bowl. Since these "buns" are large and there are 8 in total, I went with making 10 eggs, it's enough to fill each one and have a little extra if need be.

As since I covered this before, I won't rehash how to make eggs.

When they are done, spread them out on a plate and cover them in cheese. I like to make the cheese melt a bit faster by laying a paper plate upside down over it and then placing the still hot skillet over that. Yeah yeah I know "fire hazard! fire hazard!", but don't worry. You're just using the residual heat left in the pan, it won't be left on there very long, and you'll be standing right there to keep an eye on it won't you? Give it about a minute and a half and it will have melted very nicely.

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_5.jpg

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_6.jpg

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_7.jpg

Cut the eggs from 4 "sections" into 8, cut the croissants in half and then lay down one "section" of the egg cheese mix, cover with 2-4 half strips of bacon, cover, and shove into your pie hole.

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/03/05/Croissants_8.jpg

 

[ahpadt]

There's a third option for butter. Sear the steak in hot oil, then add the butter to the pan.

"To seal in the juices"?

 

[The_Finn]

mmm steak and eggs is win... I will say i am interested in your potatoe method. How do they come out? sort of like french fries i imagine i use the old school boil potatos night before leave in the fridge and then fry the next day.

 

[Jay]

The wife makes me sausage, egg and cheese biscuits every Sunday after church. Mcdonalds cannot touch how tasty they are.
That, along with some boysenberry yogurt and big mug of Chai tea with milk. Life is good on Sundays.

 

[Punisher Bass]

mmm steak and eggs is win... I will say i am interested in your potatoe method. How do they come out? sort of like french fries i imagine i use the old school boil potatos night before leave in the fridge and then fry the next day.

They come out similar to french fries, but a little bit less crunchy. There's other methods for a lot of what I do, but I just stick with what works best and easiest for me.

 

[The_Finn]

i wasn't trying to suggest either way was better. thought i am willing to bet you get more crunchiness than i do (especilly since i don't have a flattop to work with) and we all know the cruchiness is what it's all about when it comes to homefries/whatever you call them in the midwest

 

[ChelsDS]

So when will we tell our families about the wedding date.

You might be a good cook but I have no idea if you're good in other areas

I will be in the STL area end of march ;p

 

[thedguy]

You might be a good cook but I have no idea if you're good in other areas

I will be in the STL area end of march ;p

The man is 6'6" if that's any encouragement

/just trying to help pb

 

[Punisher Bass]

The man is 6'6" if that's any encouragement

/just trying to help pb

I also wear a size 14 wide.

 

[Jacobfox]

The wife makes me sausage, egg and cheese biscuits every Sunday after church. Mcdonalds cannot touch how tasty they are.
That, along with some boysenberry yogurt and big mug of Chai tea with milk. Life is good on Sundays.

Masala chai? If not, you may want to give it a shot. It's really nice and zesty. All you have to do is add a little cardamom, ginger, cinnamon and cloves (and pepper if you want) while the tea is boiling and then strain it before pouring. You can also buy chai spices at some grocery stores now. If you're drinking Tazo or something of the sort, then you're probably already drinking it.

 

[ChelsDS]

So you're a giant then? Eeeehhh....

 

[Punisher Bass]

So you're a giant then? Eeeehhh....

Well why else would I drive a Buick?

 

[Punisher Bass]

Another day, another new entry. This is a new record for me. Tonight's edition is turkey. A whole turkey. My camera crapped out on me tonight so there won't be any pictures, but this is still easy to follow.

Hardware.

1 roasting pan, real or disposable, it's up to you.
1 pastry brush.
1 meat thermometer.
1 microwaveable safe bowl.
Turkey baster.
Heavy duty aluminum foil.

Software.

A turkey. Tonight's victim is a 13lb Honeysuckle, but I've made them all the way up to almost 24lbs for Thanksgiving.
1 stick of butter.

Start by heating your oven to 325. Grab the thawed, make sure it's thawed damnit, and cut open the packaging. First thing you need to do is yank out that cheap little plastic "hey, this bitch is done cooking" doodad and throw it away, they are totally useless. Keep the packaging set aside so you'll know how long to cook it for depending on the weight of your bird.

Place the turkey in the sink, unhook the drumsticks from that metal clamp, and begin rinsing it inside and out with cold water. Make sure you get every inch, and do make sure you yank out the neck and giblets that are inside the body cavity. While you can make soup with these, I find it best to just throw them in the freezer till trash day and then throw them out. Keep rinsing the inside till the water comes out clear or atleast mostly clear.

Plop it in the roaster and melt that stick of butter. Then brush/pour the butter all over the topside. Unhealthy? Absolutly. Great tasting? Hell yeah.

Place it in the oven uncovered for 1 hour. When that is over pull it out and use the baster to suck up the juice from inside the turkey as well as what has pooled under it and spray it all over. Pop it back in for another half hour and baste it again. Wash, rinse, repeat till you're close to the cook time on the package. But about half way through or when the breast is nice and golden brown, you need to take the foil and tent it over the turkey, this will allow it to still cook but not get burned.

A few hours later you'll have a nice succulent juicy turkey. No need for a brine here.

 

[Punisher Bass]

I'm working on a new BBQ recipe as I type this. My grill is current out of order with a leaking hose and empty tank, so this one will be unlike any other I've done. This will be BBQ pulled chicken made in a crock pot. This is one I've never made before, so I've had to look to other recipes as a starting point. Each recipe I've seen is very different so I'm going to try winging it with my own version, but if the smell is any indication, I think I have a winner.

 

[Jacobfox]

Keep us posted. Sounds like this recipe has some interesting potential.

 

[Gastronaut]

Great recipes Punisher! As a tip for the potatoes from the Steak N' Eggs, consider giving the potatoes a quick par-boil before frying. This will give them an even creamier center when they're all done. You can also fry them in two stages, with the final fry using a bit of butter for some added flavor.
I have a recipe for 'em around somewhere with the specifics that I'll have to dig up.

I'm looking forward to the crock pot chicken. For me, all pulled BBQ has to be smoked to start with, but this sounds like it has great potential.

ehduhdid fer speelings

 

[Jacobfox]

Did it work?

 

[Punisher Bass]

I must say it came out very well. Better than I was expecting for my first try. It came out so well in fact that I plan to make it again this week and do a fully entry for it then.

The versions I found gave me a lot of mixed messages. Some said cook the chicken first then just throw the sauce on. Some had the balls to use plain tomato sauce or even ketchup and call that "BBQ". Some said to cook for 5 hours on high, others said cook on low for 5 hours, and it was the same for the 10 hour version. I took some elements from the better (non retarded) versions and made one that I think makes the most sense.

Not only was the end result extremely tasty, but I recon I spent less than $10 for the whole meal and got at least 12 big sandwiches out of the entire pot. That was one of my goals when I started this thread, show people how to cook good food and that it can be done cheaply.

 

[Punisher Bass]

Ok here we go. No pictures this time as there's literally nothing to take pictures of. BBQ Pulled Chicken.

Hardware.
A good sized crock pot with lid.
1 Sharp knife.
1 Large spoon.

Software.
Around 3lbs of boneless skinless chicken breasts.
1 LARGE bottle of BBQ sauce. Whatever brand gets you hard, I'm sticking with KC Masterpiece here.
Liquid smoke.
Brown sugar.
Salt.
Pepper.
Onion powder.
Hamburger buns.

Start by rinsing off and then padding dry the chicken. Then slice the breast in half length wise so you end up with thin wide fillets. Turn the crock pot to high and pour the sauce. Add 2 table spoons of brown sugar and a couple shakes of the liquid smoke, salt, pepper, and onion powder. Mix it up and throw the chicken in. If it's not mostly covered by the sauce, add some more in. Cover and let it cook for the next 5 hours.

When time is up just pull the chicken out and put it on a plate. Take a couple forks and pull it apart, which should be very easy. Once all the chicken has been taken care of, return it to the sauce and stir it up. Scoop some out onto a hamburger bun and serve with a side of chips or fries and a nice cold beer.

I'll post a picture of the end result later when this batch is done.

 

[Punisher Bass]

http://pic.armedcats.net/p/pu/punisherbass/2009/04/27/BBQ_Pulled_Chicken.jpg